Well, dinner and a movie it is

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Well, dinner and a movie it is
4
Tue, 04-03-2007 - 9:23am

The guy that I met at the car place is calling regularly and put in his bid for the weekend already. He called last night to find out when I would be free over the weekend. I told him that I have plans with my girlfriends on Friday and he said "I'll take Saturday". I said OK. He asked if I would like dinner and a movie and I said of course. He said he will call later in the week to firm things up. It should be fun.

I have to say that he is totally not my type but I decided to go and just have a good time. He is a bit country (I live in NC so hopefully someone will understand what that means). He is a painter (family business) and I prefer a professional. My X was a tradesman and totally intimidated by my education and I swore I would never go there again. There are enough problems without the insecurity. But it could be fun and if nothing else I have made a new friend. I hope I don't sound like a snob because I'm totally not. I just know what I want and right now it is just about getting out and meeting people not necessarily finding a Mr. Right.

So we shall see. I have only been out with one guy that I have wanted to see again and he has disappeared. Heck, even the ones I didn't want to see again disappear, but I think more of that is about a vibe I put off than anything else. I hate the e-mail back and forth and disappear the most but I guess that is just how on-line dating is.

That is it for me.

Priscilla

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Tue, 04-03-2007 - 10:07am

"He called last night to find out when I would be free over the weekend. I told him that I have plans with my girlfriends on Friday and he said "I'll take Saturday". I said OK."

If I was grading him, I would give him an A+ for that - he called in advance, worked around your plans and is taking you out. BINGO BINGO BINGO. To me, that shows sincere intentions and someone who is into you at least from the start.
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"I have to say that he is totally not my type but I decided to go and just have a good time. He is a bit country (I live in NC so hopefully someone will understand what that means). He is a painter (family business) and I prefer a professional. My X was a tradesman and totally intimidated by my education and I swore I would never go there again. There are enough problems without the insecurity. But it could be fun and if nothing else I have made a new friend. I hope I don't sound like a snob because I'm totally not. I just know what I want and right now it is just about getting out and meeting people not necessarily finding a Mr. Right."

I don't think you are a snob at all - but I do think you should give him a chance and not summarize that all workers are inferior to all professionals. Look at Queenbun and the drama and pain that her dodo doctor exh caused. I think it is great that you are looking at this in a casual manner and willing to give him a chance.
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"So we shall see. I have only been out with one guy that I have wanted to see again and he has disappeared. Heck, even the ones I didn't want to see again disappear, but I think more of that is about a vibe I put off than anything else. I hate the e-mail back and forth and disappear the most but I guess that is just how on-line dating is."

I don't think it is necessarily the vibes you are giving off - don't knock yourself for that. I think that everyone now adays has higher standards for a mate - they want someone similar with a certain look and personality and this is a flaky/subjective thing that none of us have control over. It seems that OLD brings out more of the tire-kickers and men who want to experiment. At least that is my experience with OLD - it is the nature of the beast. If you read the experiences on the OLD iVillage board you will see that there are many who have experieced this - some for years and years - so it is definitely not YOU.

You want someone into you with a strong pull on the fishing line. It only takes one. So if the fish nibble and swim away that is okay - at least you are getting out there and exploring different activities and people. You don't want someone who nibbles and swims away right from the start. You want someone who swallows the hook! LOL!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2002
Tue, 04-03-2007 - 10:42am

You've got the right attitude. There's not much else I can say.... One thing good about going out with someone you're not quite interested in is that it will be easier to be yourself (because you aren't worried about impressing). This is GREAT practice... take mental notes about yourself. So that you learn how you are like when you are just being free and yourself.

Enjoy the movie... enjoy the dinner!!!

Let us know how it goes.

Hugs,
Loonybunny

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2003
Tue, 04-03-2007 - 10:45am

You have a great attitude! Getting out there and meeting people with no expectations is wonderful! You are absolutely right to think you will just see how it goes and, at the very least, make a new friend.

Although I know what you mean about someone being on the same level as far as education etc. goes, there are other, more important, considerations that only become obvious over time.

So far, this guy is pushing all the right buttons, and seems very considerate (and keen!) and he gets my vote!

Definitely worth getting to know him better to see if you like him.

Clem xx

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2006
Tue, 04-03-2007 - 12:11pm

Dinner and a movie is promising. I'm glad you agreed to go. As far as him being your "type", give him a fiar chance, but it is good that you know what you want.

Not all men will be intimidated by your profession, your education, or you. The right one won't, whether he's a plumber, a teacher, or a doctor. I know plenty of professional men who are intimidated by professional women- so I'm not sure it's a tradesmen thing, rather maybe just a man thing, for some men.

Also, I do understand country, since that's my type, and I can definitely see how it wouldn't be everyone's.

Enjoy yourself, keep us posted, and go into it with a positive attitude and an open mind. If nothing else, you'll see a new movie and have dinner.

Moody, little miss sunshine today


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