What are your thoughts on roommates?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
What are your thoughts on roommates?
18
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 12:22pm
what do you think of a older guy who has a roommate? It makes me think they have financial issues and have no other choice but to have someone split bills. What are your thoughts on that? Would you date someone who had one?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2008
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 12:27pm

Yes I would date someone who had a roomie. Expecially some of these guys who work a regular job but have insane child support. You can't blame them for some of the financial issues when they're trying to do right by their kids. I've dated many men who are tight on money because of the financial obligation to their children. Heck Medic dosn't have a pot to P in because of his 3 children, but I respect the heck out of him for working so hard and going to school to better himself and make more money.


Just weigh all the facts before making a judgement.. ya know? I think that sometimes men judge me in that way. I drive an older model car (99) (however before the summer i had a major clunker junker that was in horrible shape), and I rent in a middle class townhouse community. I also do not have a lot of nice things in my place.. its very simple, everything about me is just very simple. So yah it is always in the back of my mind wondering if these men judge me and my financial situation.


Also on top of that.. if I could find another single mom who wanted to house share, I'd do it in a heartbeat because my tail will be broke until I finish school lol.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2004
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 12:29pm
Financial issues would be my first thought. On the flipside, they could just be frugal or worse cheap! In my book there is a difference between frugal / cheap. I would definitely want to know the reason and the only way to find that out is a couple of dates, so yeah, I would give them a chance.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 1:23pm

Well I've got personal experience on this topic!


BE had a roommate. BE owns his home and has no financial issues at all, in fact he is doing really well and has never really needed a roommate at all. The reason he had one was because he had an extra room that just sat there empty, and he figured, why not take in another $600 a month? So he rented that room for almost 10 years. You can imagine the money he socked away. He never "needed" it but it was always his 'play' money for vacations, and other fun stuff.


DD and I are kinda reaping the rewards. He kicked out that last roommate, the lunatic psycho veteran recently. And he used some of the money to totally redo the room for DD.


I think if you are interested in seeing a guy with a roommate, regardless of his age, I'd find out his reasons for having one. Could be convenience, or money, or even just to not live alone. Guys get lonely too!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 1:50pm

I think Pac nailed it - there might be a lot of reasons someone would have a roommate.

Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 1:57pm
No real update, just talking to a guy that has one and I wondered what others thought. I think his is a financial reason, which I'll pull out of him.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-15-2008
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 2:10pm

I think that sometimes men judge me in that way. I drive an older model car (99) (however before the summer i had a major clunker junker that was in horrible shape), and I rent in a middle class townhouse community. I also do not have a lot of nice things in my place.. its very simple, everything about me is just very simple. So yah it is always in the back of my mind wondering if these men judge me and my financial situation.


I'm totally with you on this one TJ.

JH

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2006
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 2:19pm

Totally agree Pacsun

M has a big house that is in a U shape layout. There is a guest room with private bath on the end of one wing that never gets used. So after he got laid off and because he travels a lot with the consulting business he's trying to get off the ground, he put an ad on craig's list and rented that guest room to a .....woman! P is an older lady who was not looking for a big place, she feels more secure with M around and it is a quiet upscale neighborhood with plenty of parking behind the house. The rent she pays covers his utilities and groceries. He has never missed an alimony or CS payment to his X in spite of his current situation. And he knows the plants get watered, garbage taken out, and the place is occupied while he's traveling. P works the late shift at a call center so they don't bump into one another much.

Now M is considering fixing up the pool house and renting that out. Hey, if you're house rich and cash flow is getting tight, why not? Selling the house in this market would not help much and be a financially stupid thing to do. Heck after S17 leaves for college maybe I'll get a roomie for my guest room. Get a guy who can do repairs around the house for part of the rent LOL, or maybe a very handy woman. Hah! love to see that ad: non-smoking, quiet, roomie needed to share my foothills home. Room with a city view, fireplace, private bath, pool and garage space included. Must be willing and able to do small handyman jobs. Small dog OK if gets along with other dogs (mine). Must be tolerant of children. .......What do you think? Would I get any takers?

So... yeah, I do date a guy with a roomie. I think it depends on the circumstances, kind of the never moved away from mother issue. If a guy is in a roommate situation because he has always had financial instability issues, red flag. If he has a roommate for other reasons: big place, travels a lot and needs a housesitter, prefers company to living alone- all OK reasons to have a roomie.

QB

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 2:31pm

When my parents split, my dad rented a room in a house- there were 5 bedrooms and the main kitchen, bath, living/ dining room was shared space. It kept the costs down and he had someone around to talk to. For him it wasn't that he couldn't afford a place on his own, it's that he didn't want to live alone- he liked having someone to chat with at the end of the day.

Now, if a grown man was living with a parent for any reason other than caring for an ailing parent, then I would have an issue.

The boy

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Registered: 11-20-2007
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 2:41pm
When B and I started dating he had a roommate because he traveled for work (ISO auditing/consulting) and needed someone to take care of his elderly dog. Loki was a big dog (Norweigian Elkhound) so B couldn't really take him with. The roommate got a great deal because he only had to pay like, $400 a month total and take care of Loki. Granted he did have to clean up some poop now and then, but still. Free cable tv, amenities all included and he just had to take the dog outside every few hours. Once Loki passed away though B moved into his own place because he is not the type of person who likes having a roommate. I'm sure the guy you're interested in has a good reason for having a roommate - just ask him about it.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2008
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 3:08pm

EMT has one. Its his ex wife's brother. I am fine with it. His roommate is a sweet guy and they get along fine. Doesnt bother me. Its their situation, not mine. And who doesnt have financial issues these days? Having a roommate for financial reasons just means he or she is taking that approach to settling their financial issues. My sister, the United pilot, had a roommate for a long time.

Laurie

anonymous

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