What did you learn...

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
What did you learn...
5
Tue, 08-23-2005 - 10:08pm

...about yourself when you became a single mom that really surprised you? Is there anything that you were so sure about yourself that changed when you found yourself on your own?

Alison

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Avatar for roxanne2020
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2003
Tue, 08-23-2005 - 11:36pm
I think I learned a lot about myself, I was the kind of girl that always had a boyfriend, and now I haven't dated since FOB, and I'm ok with it, don't get me wrong I'd love to have a date once in a while, but now it's not a priority....
also I'm accomplishing all of my goals, slowly but surely, before I wasn't dedicated enough, now I do it for myself and my son, I got my Cosmetology license, by the time my son was a year, I'm working full time, and I'm back in school to be a teacher,
my life changed completely and although it has been hard, i'm surviving it

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Wed, 08-24-2005 - 7:23am

I've been thinking about this question a lot.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Wed, 08-24-2005 - 8:53am

I have learned to set boundaries and to put myself first. What surprises me is that people treat you better, not worse, when you set boundaries.

You cannot be everything for everyone - that is for sure. I think that is the big mistake I made in my marriage - as First said, I lost myself. I will not do that again.

I have also learned that I control my happiness and my destiny!! A positive attitude and the high road just keep getting better every day.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2003
Wed, 08-24-2005 - 10:30am
When I became a parent (not a single parent, because that transition was not a difficult one to make), I learned that I'm a lot stronger than I ever thought possible and much more patient. I also learned that I was really selfish in the past.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 08-26-2005 - 10:35pm
I learned how lazy I really am. I was in an abusive relationship with my ex and he never let me get any sleep so I didn't clean the house he did. Now that he is gone I still don't. I'm getting help with that from a friend and really need someone to give me a kick to get it done. It's not dirty just cluttered as no one can believe. She came over tonight and was surprised I had no big messes in cabinets or under things it is just all over. We are going next time we get paid to get some things to organize and a new vaccum mine dosen't work very well. Besides that I learned that I really have no idea where all my money went. I had none with my ex and now I do. I'm back in school and would have never done that with my ex. My kids had to learn to listen to me. I worked alot even more than I do now as to not see him and he with all is flaws is a wonderful dad. Kids were not used to me telling them what to do and having to do it. HOwever are happier that I'm not so sad all the time. Biggest thing I learned is I like being at home.