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| Sun, 09-07-2008 - 11:55am |
Found this in a book I was reading last night. I think it was screaming my name, but I am interested if anyone else sees something familiar in it. I lifted it from "Lovesick, the Marilyn Syndrome". Found it in the local library, it's kind of old, but...
Mr. Wrong or Mr. Right?
If you're instantly attracted to him he is Mr. Wrong
If sparks fly, hotter than the Fourth of July, he's Mr. Wrong.
If you her wedding bells chime the second you meet him he's Mr. Wrong
If you want to go to bed with him and start thinking about sex the minute you meet him h's Mr. Wrong
If you get goose bumps just looking at him he's Mr. Wrong.
If you start to obsess over him, lose you to him the first second you meet him (or even half an hour afterwards) he is absolutely, positively 100 percent Mr. Wrong.
If you have to chase him, start to plan the campaign to win him over, he is Mr. Wrong.
If you think he's nice but feel no big-time instant hot chemistry, he's a potential Mr. Right.
If you like him but don't care if you see hm again because you don't feel hot, because you haven't felt goosebumps and you haven't lost your you, he's a potential Mr. Right.
If you feel that he could be a friend, he's a potential Mr. Right.
If you feel that he likes you, is on your case, your trail, is starting to mount a campaign to get you and this gets you nervous, it's a sure shot that he's a potential Mr. Right.
You've chosen a Mr. Wrong all your life, every time, because you believed in chemistry: if someone turned you on, THAT was love: you were attracted like a magnet to rejection, repelled by love.

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Oh yes my therapist was awesome. She was so unlike what I expected ( think old white male with calculated comments). She was vibrant, attractive, warm, and out there...but my God did she have me pegged.
Her main thing was why do I keep choosing the same scenario and it was very revealing. Similar to what City posted in another thread. She also gave me homework on flirting and being the center of attention. She also suggested I write a letter of anger to my Dad and one of forgiveness to my Mom which at the time sounded absurd. My father raised us alone. Last year, I finally went to see my Mother and was filled with forgiveness. I finally understood and realized she was a victim of mental illness and truly missed her children (she went through a painful childhood with a controlling Mom and was raped by her BIL at the age of 16...something even my father did not know. No wonder she was so fragile; (by the way it was her sister that shared that bit of information) her parents chose never to address it and act as though it never happened. She was beautiful but so broken after that...add two marriages and 7 kids in a 10 yr time frame. I am still realizing the anger I have for my father (guilt in that he raised us but in reality he didn't protect us as a parent should) but am starting to address.
I just remember the therapist telling me that I was a striking beauty and how rare it was to see the symptoms in someone like me. (typically they don't take care of themselves). She caught me off guard but in time I began to see the pattern. Funny. the guy I considered my great love was most likely just a messed up individual like me at the time. One day at time and I will get there....
"for some reason, i turn into freakazoid....."
I do that, too. That is why I was sort of disappointed in myself this summer because I could see myself repeating some patterns. Not that I was being extra super needy, but that I saw things I wasn't crazy about and let it go because I felt like I had to be something for him that I wasn't.
I had made a vow to myself that when I got into something new I wouldn't behave that way, but the "chemistry" was so overwhelming that went right back to that place to keep it going.
So now I am trying to whip MYSELF into shape, but seriously, not just "oh, yeah, I'll do it" and not follow through.
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