What's the normal prodical?
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| Sun, 02-18-2007 - 6:21pm |
Hey guys, I need advice. I started talking to this guy I meet on myspace. So he says he is single and we've imed each other 4 times and had really nice conversation. Friday night he popped an im saying how did I know you'd be here? He went on to ask my plans for the evening,told me his and asked me how far away from where he was going to be I was..
Then he changed the convo back to the nicieties and a little flirty flirty and had to get going.. I was kind of let down. He really sounded like he was going to invite me or something. I havent talked with him since. So my ? is,since we have not met on an OLD sight,but myspace, should I not get my hopes up? Or is he a player? Or is he just wanting to talk to someone online? He has told me he thinks I'm cute,that I have a "beautiful smile" (his words),and we seem to have alot in common..For those of you skilled in the fine art of OLD,(Moody)Please give me some advice..
I've decided I will still talk to him if he contacts me again,but I'm not the kind of personality to make the first move. I ham 30 years old and never asked a guy out. My thing is, if he's interested he'll do it.Am I overanalyzing this?? He is the first member of the male species that actually got me excited in a ling time, and when we have imed each other he makes me laugh,,I'm confused..

I would steer clear of myspace. OLD can be bad enough. I have heard of so many cheaters on myspace. Or, simply emotional cheaters. I mean, people who never actually "meet" another person, but flirt and cyber. In their real lives, these guys or gals have significant others or spouses.
Back to your specific question, if he wants to ask you out, he will. Do not initiate anything with him. Be extra careful with myspace.
I would be really cautious with any MySpace meetings as well. Not that I think EVERY person on there isn't real or on the up-and-up... but I also hear too many creepy stories about people who troll MySpace just looking for trouble, too. Even more than they might on an OLD site, because with MySpace, it just seems more open to all age ranges and OLD isn't.
I don't know of any protocol for what to do, who contacts who, who calls who, when you meet, when you don't, etc... I think you just have to go with your gut and play it safe. Take your time getting to know someone better before EVER meeting them in real life, and then meet only in a public place, in the daytime.
Just a few IMs back and forth for a short while isn't enough, IMO. I'd keep the chatting going for MUCH longer before agreeing to meeting in person.
~shrimpy
~shrimpy
"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.
~<
you have to be careful when using internet sites like myspace, facebook, chat rooms, etc... because there are alot of strangers & fake pople who really aren't what they say they are. for example those nasty child molesters & pedaphiles, who try to attract the teens & really young kids who use these websites by saying that they're the same age they are & that they like the same movies, music, & tv shows that they like, & that they live in the same town or city that the kids & teens do. then they tell the kids to meet them somewhere, & the kids goes out to meet these predetors & boom, they end up getting raped or murdered, & no one else can find their bodies & stuff, s they go missing without a trace!!!! in fact, i read a story right here on i-village a few weeks ago about a 14 year old girl who lived in michigan, went to visit a guy that she met onmy space, & she ended being molested & hurt by that pervert, & now her parents are suing myspace! now i'm not saying that the parents don't have any blame in these types of situations, parents should be monitoring their children on myspace & facebook & chat rooms & the internet in general, & little kids (under the age of 16), shouldn't have myspoace or facebook accounts or go on chat rooms at all in my own opinion because of those dangerous people like pedaphiles & molesters using them. but i just don't like myspace & facebook anymore because back when i used to be a member of both myspace & facebook, i kept getting messages from perverts & people that i didn't know or never talked to, & no one on myspace or facebook would help me with these problems, so i just stopped using those websites altogether!!!!
i'm sorry if i sound really gruesome & a pestemist about myspace & the other websites like it. i'm not saying that ALL PEOPLE are phonies & child molesters & such, but because of what i went through when i used those websites, i just lost interest in them!!!! see when i was a myspace & facebook user, I ONLY TALKED TO PEOPLE THAT I KNEW IN REAL LIFE, I NEVER TALKED TO STRANGERS WHEN I USED MYSPACE & FACEBOOK! i got to chat with people from my old high school (i graduated from high school 6 years ago), & a couple of people that i met while i've been in college (i'm a full time college student, i'm in my 2nd year right now). & i kept my profiles on both sites PRIVATE & I NEVER accept friend request from people unless i know them or have met them in real life only! so for a while, i didn't have any problems with strangers & weirdos trying to contact me on myspace & facebook, & i check my messages a couple of times a week on both sites, but unfortunetely, every time i left messages to the people on my friends list, i waited to get responses back from anybody that i had on my friends list, but most of them didn't write back to me at all, except for a few actual friends who were my friends before i started using myspace & facebook. this happened last summer & fall, during the first few months that i was using those websites. but even though i was being ignored by my fake "so called friends" on myspace & facebook, i decided to just talk to those actual friends every once in a while, when we all had the time to talk, since i was busy with college, & my friends were busy with stuff sometimes too, so we didn't talk to each other every day, but we did keep in concat with each other once a week or so, just like we did with e-mail & on the phone.
but then during december & january, things started to change on myspace & facebook. i started getting messages from pople that i didn't know. & they were some nasty messages, like pople asking me if i wanted to "have sex with them" & if i wanted to "screw them & f*ck their dicks & pussies" & nasty, disgusting crap like that. i kept deleting those messages & tried to ignore them. but after a few weeks, these weirdos kept conctacting me almost every day. & some of my friends on my friends list had the same problems before, & i knew popele had to delete their accounts on myspace & facebook because those perverts wouldn't stop sending them messages & the stupid administrators of both myspace & facebook didn't want to help them at all. so i also tried to get help from the admin. of both myspace & facebook, BUT NOT ONE DAMN PERSON WOULD HELP ME AT ALL!!!! everytime that i wrote to them, explaining my problems to them, i just kept getting message saying "umm sorry, we have some difficulties with our websites right now, so we can't help you"! CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT CRAP, IT MADE ME SOOO ANGRY AT MYSPACE & FACEBOOK THAT A FEW WEEKS LATER, I DECIDED TO DELETE BOTH ACCOUNTS & I HAVEN'T USED EITHER MYSPACE OR FACEBOOK SINCE!!!!
& plus with myspace, the worst website of them all, i kept getting error messages every time i went to check my messages, errors that kept saying that "we're sorry, but there is a maintenance problem that myspace is trying to fix, please wait!" WHAT THE HECK IS THAT CRAP???? & THIS HAPPENED ALMOST EVERY TIME I WENT TO MYSPACE, & I ONLY WENT ON BOTH MYSPACE & FACEBOOK A FEW TIMES A WEEK, I DIDN'T GO ON THOSE SITES EVERY SINGLE DAY!!!!
so those are JUST A FEW REASONS why i don't like myspace & facebook anymore, i think they suck!!!! but it's not like my life has stopped after using myspace & facebook, because i still talk to my true friends on the phone, on e-mail, & on instant messengers, just like before i even heard of myspace or facebook. i'm not trying to tell ANYONE HOW TO LIVE THEIR LIVES BECAUSE I'M NOT THAT TYPE OF PERSON!!!! but since you said that youo have an issue with someone that you met on myspace, i just want to warn you to be careful with usin myspace & other sites like it because not all people are what they say they are to you, & there are alot of really nasty & vile people who like to use innocent people like us & hurt people like us!!!! TRY TO ONLY CHAT WITH PEOPLE THAT YOU ALREADY KNOW, OR AT LEAST GET TO KNOW THIS GUY FOR A LONGER TIME BEFORE YOU ACTUALLY GO TO MEET HIM IN REAL LIFE, & IF YOU DO DECIDE TO ACTUALLY MEET HIM, DO IT IN A CROWDED PUBLIC PLACE WITH MANY OTHER PEOPLE SURROUNDING YOU DURING THE DAYTIME, NEVER EVER MEET ANY STRANGER YOU MET ON THE INTERNET AT NIGHTTIME OR AT AN EMPTY HOUSE OR SOMETHING!!!! i know alot of pople love usiing myspace, just like some of myfriends & cousins that use mysoace & facebook all the time, but i tired both myspace & facebook out for a few months, & i just didn't see the big deal with either of them, i didn't get really excited with using myspace & facebook, & i didn't make tons of new friends through those sites, they're not for me, that's just my honest opinion: so please folks, don't be mad at me for dissing myspace & facebook!!!!
well i got to go now, i have to get ready to go to bed. i hope that everything works out for you & THIS MESSAGE IS FOR EVERYONE ON I-VILLAE & WHO USE MYSPACE & FACEBOOK & ANY OTHER SITE: PLEASE, PLEASE BE REALLY CAREFUL WHEN TALKING TO PEOPLE THAT YOU DON'T KNOW IN REAL LIFE!!!!
thanks,
karen
I think I learned a lot from this thread too... I thought myspace was like any other OLDs. So many people I know in real life have a myspace account... Many of my coworkers, for example. If i meet someone in real life and hang out with them, then I'll put them on my friends list. I don't normally reply to anyone I "meet" over myspace. Once and a while I'll flirt but I don't meet them in person. Like I might send a message to someone about a common interest but it usually doesn't lead to anything... It's just fun flirting practice. The other use for myspace is keeping in touch with old friends and family. A way to stay in touch with people I know in real life... not so much a place to meet others. But lots of people I know treat myspace like OLD and don't have problems. Go with your gut.
Or if I meet someone in real life... I'll search myspace to see if they have a page.... Most times I find them and then learn a little more about them... age, interest, ect... Besides the pedifiles... most people are VERY honest with their myspace page... If a guy has porn stars for friends, then he's probably a player or loser.... if he has lots of vulgar friends who post vulgar comments...again a red flag. But I suppose anyone can lie so a good profile doesn't tell much... I guess myspace is a good tool to atleast learn if someone is BAD news because people wouldn't lie about that...
LB
Somehow I missed this entire thread, and now I'm responding.
I have a myspace. I NEVER use it for dating. Nearly all of my friends are my actual, real life friends. I am a part of a couple of groups, so I don't really know those friends- very similar to this board, actually. I use it to keep in touch with people I haven't seen in a while, or those who have moved far away. I do not use it to meet new ones.
When I get comments from people I don't know, I delete them. MySpace is not at all the same as OLD, since there's really not an effective monitoring system, it's completely free, which doesn't deter the whack jobs, and the only real rules are pretty much unspoken.
However, I do check to see if people I've met have a page- much for the same reason Loony states. You can learn a lot about someone through their "friends", comments, and blog, if they have one. Incidentally, Spec has a MySpace, and his friends are all real people- his sisters, cousins, and coworkers. And me.
Moody, playing catch up tonight
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