When do you go "private"
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When do you go "private"
| Sun, 12-25-2005 - 8:19pm |
I feel silly asking this question...
How long should you know someone before going to their house to watch a movie or them coming by your house to watch a movie?
People always recommend going out to public places when you are first getting to know someone... Over the years, I have not given this any thought and just blindly went to people's houses... the ironic thing is I feel the "safest" with this new guy I'm dating... I just wanted to know what other people think or have done...
BTW, I have gone out with him 5-6 times (public places), we've been seeing each other for close to 1 month, talked on phone, e-mail, etc... and I have not gotten any red flags...

This is a good question. And almost everyone who responds will have a different opinion.
I can tell you my opinion and what I would do. I would not go private until the relationship is well established and I am sure it is going to last and that his intentions are for an LTR that is monogamous. Going to a house is risky in that it might lead to intimacy and you have to talk about that in advance or know how you will react in advance.
It sounds like you have taken it slow so far and it is good you have not seen any major red flags - keep us posted.
Hey Judy!
Thanks for your advice... I am new at establishing relationships... I wonder what is all involved... How long does it take to have an established relationship? I am definitly planning on waiting a LONG time before getting physically intimate...
Okay, so we've been dating for about 1 month, I know that he is definitly "into me", and I am "into him". If I say something along the line of, "Things are growing steadily along. I really enjoy your company and spending time with you. Before I go away on a ski trip (mid January) or over at your place to watch a movie, I would like to know what your intentions are. You see, I don't get involved lightly with someone, and I want to see if we are on the same page."
Does that sound too aggressive? Or is that the right balance of being assertive and not wimpy like, "Do you like me? Check "YES" or "NO"
I have a tendency to go full force as you've heard from prior posts and I really want this to go the distance in the right way... As I said, he has been a true gentleman and has not man-handled me like my last 50 dates... Really, it has been 50 dates... LOL!
Thanks again for the feedback,
PoolDiva