Will I never find someone being a mom?
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| Tue, 10-03-2006 - 3:00pm |
Hi ladies,
I hope maybe some of you may have experiences that can help me to gain a little bit of perspective here.
I am a 23 yr old single mother of a five year old boy.
I recently broke up with my ex boyfriend (I just broke up with him a month ago) 25 year old man that showed signs of not really being in love with the idea of me having a kid. We were together for 2 years and he would always tell me that me having a kid made things more complicated for us. He was nice to my son, but I noticed that he just didn't really get attached to him, or really interact with thim. My boy loves him a lot and looks up to him and it breaks my heart that my ex never really bothered to be at least a friend to him you know?
Well, my point is that I guess after being in this relationship with this guy and ending it. I really feel like no one will really want me because I have a kid. I am a really young mother and my friends don't have any kids so I see them dating guys and I just feel like the minute I say that I have a kid, they show no more interest.
Sometimes I a also afraid that i will attract a guy but it won't be a man that's really deserving of me because I have a kid. In other words, I feel like I will have to settle for less and that I can't ask for much because I am a single mom. I feel defective. I don't know what to do. I am a very pretty girl and very outgoing but that though is always in my head for some reason. And this recent break up I had is still killing me inside.
Help please :-(

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Oh fivesense - that is so well said! We always appreciate your input!
How are things going with you?
"When you are ok with who you are and know that you deserve to be loved and are not defective, the right kind of man will come along."
AMEN - couldn't say it better!! So glad you are here!
You know what? You dont NEED a man at all right now.
Give youself more credit. Please!
Have you had any counseling? It sounds as if you have had a very tough time of it. Hang in there .... this too shall pass. R~
Hunnie, You are headed down the right road. Talking to anyone(even here) helps. You have a long way to go to gain that confidence that say's "I am woman, therefore I am strong". You are strong you know, I can see "it" and when you can see "it", that will be the time that it's OK to be strong alone.
Taking the time to find yourself isn't a sentence it's a chance to enjoy yourself and your children.
My DS is 15 going on 50, we love each other very much. I totally enjoy spending the time my own parents spent working on their crummy relationship they now have after 30 plus years. They are still together because they are afraid of being alone.
I can't see working that hard to love someone other than my child. Why put my child thru cruddy relationship after cruddy relationship to have him see me fail and him have to continually have to get used to the new guy. I love the fact that I found who I am before I subjected my DS to a relationship(or numerous ones) that he would also have to grieve the loss of.
Jer
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