Working things out

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Working things out
32
Wed, 07-23-2008 - 11:35pm

I like how Blue Eyes and I work things out these days. I swear it's taken time, but we seem to be able to get along without too much drama anymore..and when things happen it's so much less often these days. The drama daughter has not been an issue at all for months. Which seems to coincide with BH not calling him anymore. I am so relieved. And he drinks considerably less these days. He is very conscious of it.


~Pacific~

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Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Wed, 07-23-2008 - 11:55pm
Hey Pac! That's awesome! I agree it's a great step towards acceptance and respect for everyone's personal character. I still react too much and I agree it is a part of my own insecurities, but also about not being walked all over. I'm so glad you are both coming together more on a level of meeting half way and not just a it's my way or the highway attitude! Look forward towards more great posts about you two!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2006
Thu, 07-24-2008 - 10:37am
Hey Pacific - that is a great post!
Rosecolouredspecs
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
Thu, 07-24-2008 - 10:48am

Hey Pac.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Thu, 07-24-2008 - 12:12pm

Thanks, Kat..


Yes, acceptance and respect are big. It seems we have learned (and are still learning) to respect each others feelings and work towards coming to the middle rather than both of us pulling tightly in a power play. It is a phase we're transitioning into and it feels, well, solid. As I walked away from that misunderstanding yesterday I had a sense of securuty, safety, knowing it was not the end of the world. Before I would have over reacted. So we are growing.. thanks for your words!

~Pacific~
~Pacific~
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Thu, 07-24-2008 - 12:14pm

Thanks Moon,


Yeah, it feels good to be on common groud..it feels sturdy and comfortable. Thanks for popping in and checkin on us today especially with all you have going on. You are do dear!


XO


~Pacific~
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Thu, 07-24-2008 - 12:18pm

Evolving is a good way to describe it!


I talked to him last night, and he said he feels the same- more solid with me because we have stopped over reacting with each other and can calmly talk. It's taken almost two years but really the "work" only started a few months ago. It does take work to negotiate a common ground and get to where you are comfortable with how you work things out...unless of course you are blessed with a relationship where you never ever butt heads over anything. But who has that, lol?


~Pacific~
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
Thu, 07-24-2008 - 12:50pm
wonderful update! It is SO satisfying and great to reach a point like you have with BE when you can have a fight, and then make up in a positive way! Cuz let's face it, no relationship is perfect and those who claim to have one are full of it. Couple are going to disagree and when you can do so, and then come back together and fix it it makes you feel so much closer and makes the relationship stronger :) WTG!!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Thu, 07-24-2008 - 12:54pm

I've been trying to get to that point too.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Thu, 07-24-2008 - 1:10pm

Thanks for those kind words!


What felt good yesterday was that I got home still ticked- then it hit me, I was acting like a brat. I swalled my big pride pill, just picked up the phone and called him back. It is so much easier now.. for both of us. We have fostered a new level of trust and I'm happy about that :o)


~Pacific~
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-15-2008
Thu, 07-24-2008 - 1:50pm
That's really awesome.

JH

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