Choose the guy with your heart or your head?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2006
Choose the guy with your heart or your head?
Sun, 10-24-2010 - 2:53pm

I have recently joined a co-ed sports team and found myself being courted by

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2009
Sun, 10-24-2010 - 11:29pm

Which one would I pick? NONE. Look elsewhere, as both the head and heart must agree. These 3 men are not the last 3 men alive on the planet. You are obviously an attractive woman and the world is your oyster. Why settle for the man with 5 kids and tons of problems? You would only hear his side of the story on why his two marriages failed. Maybe he's a poor partner. Even if he was a good partner, do you really want to be with someone who has to divide his time between you and five children? There are lots of good looking men out there with good personalities. It takes time and effort to find them, but worth it in the long run. Go find one without so many problems.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 9:10am

I would never ever date a man who had been married twice and had five children between them. That's just me personally, but it seems to be a big issue for you too, so I'd advise you to trust your instincts and not get involved with someone who has that much "past" in their "present". That paired with his financial instability means he's not a great catch right now.

A man who has gone through two divorces probably hasn't learned much about how to make relationships work. I'm sure there are exceptions but I wouldn't count on it. Why take the risk? You sound like a girl who is in high demand, you can find a man who looks good on paper AND makes you feel chemistry.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 7:05pm

You know what the best thing is!!! - Look for more men - ok


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2005
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 10:45pm
These aren't the last three men on the planet, right? The heart and head must agree, they really do. Because when they do, it's *simple* to choose, it's not all dramatic and angsty.

Sure, five kids twice-divorced guy is funny, charming and sweet, how do you think he got two different women to say not only yes but yes, Daddy! But THINK, they also both said goodbye. There must be a reason for that, too.

Keep looking, keep these guys as pals, and teach yourself to see that nice guys can be exciting when it comes to the right woman.

Good luck!

Myspace Codes

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
Fri, 10-29-2010 - 11:49pm

good answer. i was thinking that if it was me, i would probably give one of the other two without the baggage a chance. but i can identify with her not being attracted to someone, no chemistry. i can understand as i have been there. of course, the one with 5 kids and 2 ex-wives is a big NO-NO. that one sounds like a red flag to me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2010
Wed, 11-03-2010 - 11:30am

Catch, you have to look to catch. They don't come to let you catch them, right? Esp. those good CATCH. By the way, you are a great catch!

He has nothing in his life but drama! 2 ex wives, 5 kids, if he isn't a deadbeat dad, he is going to be broke for a very long time.