confused!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2008
confused!!!
10
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 7:32pm
Hi everyone,

Please help me to decide to next step...

I have been fwb with this guy for two years now. The first year into the fwb relationship, I've told him that I wanted to be more than friends, a relationship. He wanted me down, he said that he's burnt out from "love" and doesn't see himself being with anyone else. I took that as he's working through his past relationship of three years and he just needs time....Now another year has gone by, I find myself at the same spot wanting to take to the next level. Sometimes, I caught myself doing things to impress him, or to prove to him that I'm worthy of being his girlfriend. However, at times, I do want to give up on him, because I see that I couldn't change someone's else mind. ..........Through the two years, he does tell me stories from this ex-girl, and it doesn't bother me. However, it has been lately. If he just mentions "my ex" when he;s telling me a story, I get heated. But he mentioned her without knowing that he's doing it. Now, whenever I sleep with him, I have dreams of him introducing a random girl as his ex, I slap him out of frustration. I told him about the dreams, he said that I'm just obsess about his ex. ........I do feel that he cares for me but not as much as I the same way as I feel for him. Should I just step back from being fwb and just remain friends, or move on??????..........I do contradict myself, because I feel that it has been two years already, so this guy isn't making any action............Thank you for your time...
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2010
In reply to: lovedangel
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 10:03pm

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2010
In reply to: lovedangel
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 10:17pm
FWB mean FRIENDS with benefits. Please comprehend that is the type of relationship you and he have. If you want a different relationship then you will have to find that elsewhere.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2008
In reply to: lovedangel
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 11:44pm
Thank you.....Someone, who's into me is waiting for me somewhere...
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007
In reply to: lovedangel
Fri, 07-02-2010 - 7:39pm
This guy is a jerk - so many red flaggs - don't waste your time or emotions -it ain't

Denise

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
In reply to: lovedangel
Fri, 07-02-2010 - 8:04pm

Hi Angel. This really isn't confusing. A lot of times that's what happens with a FWB relationship. One person (generally the woman) gets emotional/falls in love with him. Unfortunately it's not what he's wanting.


I say leave him and find someone who is going to want more from you and will be able to give you what you want. It's not with this man, and he's been honest about it.



july4.gif picture by nhgal2006



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28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
In reply to: lovedangel
Fri, 07-02-2010 - 8:08pm
Whoa! Where did that come from? Why is he a jerk? All they have is a FWB relationship.



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
In reply to: lovedangel
Fri, 07-02-2010 - 10:07pm

They were in a FWB, she agreed to a FWB but now her feelings

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007
In reply to: lovedangel
Sat, 07-03-2010 - 4:03pm

Sorry - you misunderstood or I didn't state it right - it seems she is looking for more than FWB and he is not there - so why waste your time - unless this guy misleading her - and if he is misleading her - then he is a jerk


This wasn't a put down or judgement call - you know likes its either there beyond FWB or not.

Denise

Denise

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007
In reply to: lovedangel
Sat, 07-03-2010 - 4:06pm
Then I misread her post - sorry guys.

Denise

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
In reply to: lovedangel
Fri, 07-09-2010 - 9:09am

I'm sorry but the others are right. He is being perfectly clear with you, but you're not truly accepting it because you want something different.

You've got an ice cream stand, and you're just dying for a chocolate eclair. It's the only thing that's going to satisfy what you really want. So you tell the ice cream man, "how much for a chocolate eclair?" and he says, "sorry I've only got creamsicles". You say, "but I really want a chocolate eclair" and he shows you the contents of the ice cream stand - Filled with creamsicles, but not one chocolate eclair. Are you going to stand there for two years arguing about what you want, thinking that wanting that chocolate eclair even more is going to magically make them appear? Or are you going to move onto another ice cream stand that actually has what you need?