He Says He is Ready for children! :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2007
He Says He is Ready for children! :)
9
Sat, 03-24-2012 - 4:14pm

Hi.

I've been with my bf coming up

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-12-2012
Thu, 04-12-2012 - 1:04pm
Just a quick thing... I agree a marriage does not make you a couple... I also never thought a wedding was important untill my boyfriend at the time now my husband went into the hospital and they would not let me see him in intensive care because I was not family... BTW I was in BC at that time... I hope you never have an instance like this but marriage is still important.... Even if you just make it a private thing for you and your boyfriend and go to the courthouse and have a nice dinner after... Maximum cost is $500.
Avatar for purp2010
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2010
Fri, 04-06-2012 - 12:49pm
I live in Canada too and I'm pretty sure you only get one year per child. You can split it between you but EI only covers one year total. Maybe his work would pay a top up to EI, but I don't think you can each take a year.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Tue, 03-27-2012 - 8:54pm

I wish I had lived in Canada when I had my kids--3 mos. unpaid maternity leave for me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2007
Mon, 03-26-2012 - 2:41pm

Thanks for replying. We don't have/need health insurance, we live in canada. We have our BC medical cards that cover anything and everything,Minus a few small things like perscriptions, physio, massage etc.Plus my bf has full 100% benefits and coverage through his work that cover me and him including perscriptions and extras like physio, even though we aren't married.So we are covered in every medical aspect.As long as he has his job with the same company and we live together I get full coverage, as would any children we have.So if he chooses to be a stay at home dad that will be find.I found out I was mistaken in regards to myself getting mat leave through his company, I don't but my own work provides it for one year.Then he can take his after me. And his is paid!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Mon, 03-26-2012 - 10:23am

I agree that people can be committed to each other w/o being married. My dentist has been w/ his partner for almost 25 yrs, they have a child together, own a house and in all respects act like a married couple.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2007
Sun, 03-25-2012 - 6:27pm

Thanks for the response.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Sun, 03-25-2012 - 4:38pm

Pink, I agree with what you wrote about marriage.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2007
Sun, 03-25-2012 - 12:43pm

Hes not unsure if he wants to get married,it's just not something that will be happening for another few years.

And we do live together, we have lived together for over two years, recently we just moved across the country last July and so far have made an amazing success of it which I believe is a small testimant to how strong our relationship is. Not every young couple can make such a drastic move and make it work.Every couple I know that has tried making big moves like we did failed horribly lol. Their relationship couldn't handle the stress and they crumbled.

Neither of us really care about the "ideal plan" get married than have children.This day in age it isn't as frowned upon, if your in a stable, healthy relationship there is no reason you need to be married to have a child.I know many couples that have been together 10 years and have children but they aren't married and never plan to be. We plan to be just not for another few years. A wedding you need to be prepared to spend thousands and thousands upfront all at once, whereas a child obviously costs alot of money as well, however not say $15 or 20 000 at one time. Its spaced out, over months and years. We have already done the budgeting and know we can afford a child, we've proven if need be we can save alot of money in a short period of time and still pay all of our bills and keep food on our plates.Anyways, I wasn't asking for criticism, as there are no problems anywhere in my relationship, and I wasn't posting because I feel there is a problem. I was simply asking for thoughts on men who bring up the idea of having children, and what that says about them....

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Sat, 03-24-2012 - 10:06pm

OK I know I'm old but I just do not understand this train of thought--he's not sure if he's ready to get married (i.e. to promise to commit to you for life) but