HELP Why is he doing this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2008
HELP Why is he doing this?
Sun, 08-29-2010 - 7:11pm

OK so I posted several months ago about a guy I met that was on and off again with the mother of his child. We broke it off and during our time apart, they finally broke it off. After awhile, I contacted him (I didnt know that theyd broken it off yet), and said sumthin like "So you dont contact me anymore because your feelings are too strong for me to just be friends?" And he said that was true...and we started talking again.

After meeting up, I found out they had broken up. All of our feelings were there and I felt even stronger than I did before. He said he wanted to be with me, but I felt like

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2010
Sun, 08-29-2010 - 8:20pm

On-again, off-again treatment means he wants p***y when he doesn't have anything better to do. I think that you are searching far and wide to convince yourself otherwise. Good luck.

Edited 8/29/2010 8:30 pm ET by coconut2010


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Mon, 08-30-2010 - 7:35am

He's doing it because he can and it works for him, you're there when he wants, he's gone when he doesn't want you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Mon, 08-30-2010 - 11:53am
He's using you whenever his mood strikes. Why do you keep putting up with it? Forget him and move on.

V224333_103.jpg picture by nhgal2006

"Friendship isn't about whom you have known the longest,
It's about those who came and never left your side ...."

28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007
Mon, 08-30-2010 - 7:21pm

Before I read what everyone has said to you - its not going to work and don't waste your time - he is not there and he certainly is not ready for another relationship - only from what you said - he tends to maybe - this is a maybe -bi-polar tendencies - which I know very well.


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2008
Mon, 08-30-2010 - 7:24pm

You know, I don't know if I agree that he is intentionally using you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 09-01-2010 - 11:19pm
He's doing it because he can. You are aware that he is fresh out of a relationship what did you expect? When a relationship ends the worse thing to do is rush into another one. In this case he still has feelings for his ex because the break-up is so new. You made yourself readily available for him to use to try to get over his ex or to rebound with. He clearly needs more time before starting anything with you no matter how slow you try to take it. Good luck.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2009
Fri, 09-03-2010 - 9:16am

It doens't matter why he's doing this. The fact is that he will continue to play you until you stop letting him.

Cut off all contact with him, now and forever. Do not answer if he calls. Do not reply to emails/FB requests.