How can I tell if he is interested in me or just being nice?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2010
How can I tell if he is interested in me or just being nice?
17
Tue, 07-19-2011 - 7:26pm

I'm 24, he's 26. Not that age really matters here, but I guess it could. I work at a bank and have thought that he was cute from the first time I saw him. He is a customer so I don't want to make it awkward and so far it hasn't been. We have slowly been talking more and more when he comes in. This week has been the most we have ever talked. Here are a few reasons why I think he may be interested, but I'm not very good at telling whether guys are interested or not. I always think they are and then they only like me as a friend, and obviously since our only interaction is while I'm working, I can't really get to know him that well.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2011

Yeah - stop the Facebook and see what happens

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2010

I'm kind of confused by your post. Stop the facebook? Why is it not a good idea to contact him on there?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007

Hi Chel.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2010
Thank you! Sometimes I think I imagine all of these things being that he likes me because I really want him to. I guess we will see it wouldn't be impossible that he likes me, but I'm just going to go with the flow. If something more happens, it happens, if it doesn't, it doesnt :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2011

I thought it was fine to try Facebook - but if he doesn't go there that often - one you worry about it, get confused cuz you don't know - I think the better opportunity is at the bank and then she can ask - did you get my facebook msg

Thats what I meant - sorry if I wasn't clearer before

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2010
That's ok! He did write me back, but there really wasn't anything I could say to what he responded. He just said "yeah, that's them! I don't know them but some guys I am friends with work there". I didn't want to respond since he didnt really ask me anything else directly and I didn't want to seem needy. Do you thinking should have responded?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2011

Sorry - I was getting confused as to who started this thread - You know - I think he is just a nice customer - just play it by ear when he comes to the bank

You're right - NEVER come off needy or desperate (even if you feel it inside)

You know the minute I didn;'t care to marry again (at 30) is basically when I met my second husband.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2010
He actually came in again and mentioned that those were the right people. Maybe I should have responded. I kind of feel bad now. I was thinking about saying I didn't get it until today and telling him that I hope he has fun at the lake, but I'm not really sure what to do. I don't want to lie to him though because I saw it the second he sent me the message....
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2010

I didn't end up responding, but when I saw him Friday, the first thing out of his mouth was "Yeah, that was the right person!" So I kind of feel bad about not responding since he said something about it right off.

I'm still not really sure what to think, but I have fun talking to him when he's in. I guess I will just have to see what happens. I was thinking on Friday night that I should have responded (even though we already talked about what I had written) so I decided to write "Sorry I didn't respond sooner, I hope you have a good weekend at the lake- I'm jealous." Except my phone decided to press send in the middle of it so it ended up being in two messages. Hopefully he doesn't think I''m a crazy drunk or something, lol. But I haven't heard back from him on that one yet. I guess I will just talk to him at work about the lake. I don't know if I should have done that or not, but that's what I felt at the time, so I decided to do it. I don't see much harm in telling him to have a good weekend.

I guess I really shouldn't get my hopes up about him since he is likely just a niice guy.. oh well :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2011

Quit wondering and just ask him next time he comes to your window if he'd wanna grab lunch with you sometime. You already have a friendly base to start with and are friends on fb. The worse he could do is tell you no. If he says yes, great! If not? Then you get to open your eyes to find someone else. Dinner is a little bit much of a leap and lunch would be casual and hopefully lead to something more meaningful. Hope this helps!

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