I just don't get it

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2009
I just don't get it
Fri, 09-23-2011 - 2:16pm

I've posted on other boards (and here, a long time ago) but here is the quick background.

Me: Divorced 6 years, 2 adult kids, 50-something, ten years away from retirement age.

Him: Widower 3--almost 4-- years. just turning 60 this year, 3 adult kids, 2 years away from early retirement.

He can afford to retire early (though medical insurance will pose a challenge).

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Fri, 09-23-2011 - 4:35pm

I don't think I'd want to be married to or living w/ this guy--he sounds a lot like my ex (who was depressed).

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-1999
Sat, 09-24-2011 - 1:04am

Am I getting entangled with a new version of my ex?

Or, are you looking to get entangled with a new version of your father?


Cynic: a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.---Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2010
Sat, 09-24-2011 - 8:26pm

It is not a man thing. It's just some people of both genders are passive complainers. About 20 years ago, I had a dinner date with a divorcee. We were seated at a table with 2 extra unused chairs. The chair

Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 09-26-2011 - 3:42pm

It sounds like you are involved with a person who likes to complain but does not do anything about it (turning down a company car) and does not have an outside life beyond you ( you mentioned his loneliness).

I personally would not want to be involved with a person who enjoys being miserable for I think that is life sucking.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2005
Wed, 10-05-2011 - 11:52am

What you've got on your hands is a man who is all talk and no action.

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