So, long story short.
"I do want to hook up with him again, but I don't think I'm really over him."Then I think you should look at the obvious conclusion: Hooking up with him is going to bring you heartache and complication and it's not worth it.
Can I give you my most honest guess at what's going through your ex's mind?I think he enjoyed the hookup, doesn't want to give you the impression that he wants anything further (possibly fed you a load of BS about a "sick family member" to get you off his back), but is weirded out by the thought of you and Bob hooking up.
"I know guys always say they will call and they dont'"Not when they really like a girl, or have integrity.
Your ex doesn't really like you.
There's nothing wrong with being "girly" and dating like a man doesn't necessarily mean you run around having casual sex. Casual sex is not appealing for everyone - Both male and female - And even if you want someone sexually, if you can't handle being treated like you don't exist afterward, then casual sex is not for you. And that's completely okay.
Just let the ex go, most people hook up with an ex once or twice in their life for an easy lay (I've done it LOL) but you can't have feelings involved or it gets messy.
Move on to new territory.
You got in touch with him because you wanted some fun, so that's what he gave you. It sounds like it's just sex for him. I don't think you should get your hopes up with him. Move on, try to find someone who will want you more than just for sex.
As for him calling "Bob" all night, he probably just didn't like the idea of the two of you together. Probably figured because he wasn't around, that you'd have some fun with Bob instead.
Do you have other friends you can hang out with? A different group than who he knows? That's what you need.
You wrote: I do want to hook up with him again, but I don't think I'm really over him. Why would you want to hook up with him again.
I used to believe in forever, but forever was too good to be true.Winnie the Pooh
Unfortunately, the sex is really really good.