Post stories to cheer up Northwestwande

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2003
Post stories to cheer up Northwestwande
Wed, 04-23-2003 - 6:02pm
Hi.. I hope you think this story is funny. When it happened to me I thought it

was. At any rate, it's my contribution to try to cheer you up!

A few years back I went out with this handsome red-haired man. On the first

date, our conversation revealed that he had many of the characteristics

that I was looking for. He had a good "touch" too he rubbed my neck and shoulders

and I thought his fellow has possibilities. On a subsequent date we went

to an open air concert and got seats near the front (near the speakers).

This ended the conversation between us because the music from the speakers drowned out

and converstaion. Part way through the performance I started to hear this loud snore... and I mean LOUD snore. I became amused by this interesting sound effect accompaniment to the music and noted the fit between the snoring and the music. Then I turned to my date and realized that he had fallen asleep and it was him!!!

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 04-23-2003 - 6:39pm
Thanks for posting that story, Suzili, that did make me laugh!


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 04-23-2003 - 9:13pm
Well I was once a young man in the 8th grade. I had a bad fall and racked myself something fierce. My marbles were both swollen and I looked like I was smuggling kiwi fruit in my shorts...

Anyway, my mom took me to the doctor...which was embarrassing because the doctor wanted to take a sperm count to make sure that they were still working. Can you imagine your mother asking her 14-year-old son if they know how to make sperm come out? Well, there is not much more embarrassing than knowing that you have to produce something, your mother knows what you are doing, and there's a time constraint...I still have nightmares of her saying, "Is everything alright in there?" Had I been a little more suave, I'd have taken my time and asked my mom to get me a nurse to help me out. The long short of it...everything turned out alright.

Fast forward a couple of months to the school district athletic enrollment day. All athletes in the school district needed to show up to register, pay their athletic fee, get a brief physical, and provide a urine sample. Well...since my last name starts with a "B", I had to show up in the morning around 8:00am and there were only a few guys and a bunch of girls. Now, having just used a similar cup just a couple months earlier, I took the cup with me and went into th restroom.

Imagine the look on everybody's face when the front of everybody...looks at the cup and says, "What is this?....oh..OH! No No...we need a urine sample!" Well, that embarrassment that I felt just two months earlier...that was not embarrassment I decided. In fact, I've never felt anything quite like what I felt at that moment. Sort of a state of red numbed panic. I actually wished I could spontaneously combust.

Now this has nothing to do with dating, I would doubt the opposite sex can imagine the feeling, but I hope it made you laugh.


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2003
Wed, 04-23-2003 - 10:30pm
I have another two.. I was rushing around getting ready for a very important

meeting. I ran into a coffee shop grabbed a sandwich and dashed off to the

meeting. I had to present something, and people were looking at me quizzically

After I was wondering what was up. Went into the washroom, washed my hands and

started talking to the person next to me. As soon as I opened my mouth

I knew what had happened. My whole top set of teeth had caked-in sandwich

embedded on and around the teeth. A total nightmare!

My most embarassing moment was when I went for a job interview one time. After the

interview I was really distracted. I walked out of it with my left boot on one foot

and one of the secretaries at that office's right boot. The two boots didn't even look alike. My boot was tall. Hers was short. When I arrived back at my office, took off the boots (still didn't notice) the phone rang. The secretary from the company phoned me and said.. Hi Suz, uh could you please bring my boot back. I need it to go home!! Needless to say, no second interview at that company!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-24-2003 - 12:13pm
Mine (not sure if it is as funny as you probably had to be there). Having finished lunch with my friend on Monday, I walked west between madison and 5th avenue near Rockefeller Center in NYC - lo and behold, a red haired man in his late 20's/30's rides up beside me on a bicycle - on the sidewalk (!) and asks me where the Sam Ash Music Store is. As I'm thinking about it he breaks out into a huge smile and says - loud - thinks "ALLCAPS" I just got laid off yesterday and I feel soooooo great! I am so happy riding my bicycle wherever I want to go!!!" - not verbatim but close - I ask him why Sam Ash rather than a large record store and he again says jubiliantly "Because I want to play guitars - I love playing guitar!" He was just glowing - that let out of jail free card look. He rode off and I thought - what a New York Moment. Loved it!