Roller Coaster "relationship"?
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|Mon, 04-21-2003 - 4:16pm|
I met this guy Chris right as I was ending a relationship with someone else. He is in the military and has several "civilian" jobs (working at least 60-80 hours a week) and I met him dancing alone in a night club. I even picked up a "I have been hurt before" vibe from him (it seemed like he was trying to busy himself with work so that he wouldn't think about relationships right now). Anyway, we completely connected, talking for hours on end. We were also very sexually attracted to one another and began a very fulfilling sexual relationship. He told me that he isn't looking for a girlfriend-type relationship, he wants to start as friends and see where it goes (if it goes) but he also wanted us to be sleeping exclusively with one another. Like I said, we got very close very fast, then he didn't call for about a week and when he did he said he hadn't called because he figured I needed more time to get over stuff with my recent ex. (We never really talked about the ex, but he knew I was just getting out of a relationship.) The ex and I had lived together for a short while, but he was still in the apartment for a while when I began seeing Chris (which aparently upset Chris, especially since he commented on it). He pulled away, not wanting to get hurt (a male friend explained to me that Chris was probably afraid that he would get the call that I was back with the ex or something similar). Our relationship then became primarily sexual, and whenever any conversations did occur he would get intimate then freak out for a while. Finally by the end of January, he had broke his wrist and then invited me over and I took care of him and then I left... and didn't hear from him again.
Well, about a month ago I accidentally called his cell phone (his name is right below my uncles and I meant to call my uncle) and didn't realize it until I got his voicemail. I left a message saying hi and that I would like to be friends.
Last week he called my back... to my surprise (I had figured I would never hear from him again). He called me after a night shift and wanted to see me. I had errands to run, so I told him I would meet him for lunch. We spent a good 4 hours together talking and talking about everything (primarily our views on marriage, love, relationships, etc. which is not usually a conversation you have with "just a friend" of the opposite sex). It was actually the most intimate conversation we had ever had. We didn't talk about us being in a relationship... I think it is way too soon to jump into anything. The poor guy sacrificed his sleep just to keep talking to me, he had been awake since 5 the night before and had to be at work again at 9 that night.
Now here is my question, what is going on with him? He is definitally a nice guy (vs a player or anything similar) he is just like a scared turtle. Is there hope that this relationship will someday turn into something viable or am I just wasting my time?