should i call it quits?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2009
should i call it quits?
8
Sat, 04-24-2010 - 1:37am

i have posted on here several times about this guy i have been (seeing) and im still confused. its been 2 months since we met and he still hasnt said if he wants a relationship or if he wants anything to come out of this.

we hang out all the time usually at his house or sometimes we go out and do things, we text eachother throughout the day and he can be so nice and sweet to me but other times he just blows me off, like for example today he didnt text me at all so i texted him asking what he was doing tonight and he said he was going to the bar with his freinds and thats all he said and i still havent heard from him and he usually will invite me to go with.

whenever i ask him how he feels about me or what he wants he just tells me he really likes me and he likes hanging out with me, sleeping with me, talking to me and he likes it when i stay the night with him even though i usually leave before he wakes up. he also has told me that he dosent understand me so when i asked why he dosent he said cause i dont no what i want even though i have told him before that i really like him and wanted to try and start something a little more serious with him but apperenlty he dosent remember that. does it usually take a guy this long to decide if he wants to be with someone or am i just being used and played? its like its hot and cold with this guy and i have been honost with him and i tell him all the time how i feel about him. im nice to him i pay for alot of things like food and stuff, i text him good morning and have a good day at work almost everyday. whenever he has a bad day i will sit and talk to him about it and try to help him the best i can. if his back or legs hurt from working i will give him a back rub. its like im putting my heart and feelings out there for him and sometimes its like he dosent care. so im woundering if i should just call it quits and move on or if i should wait and see if he comes around? any advice would be good thanks

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2010
Sat, 04-24-2010 - 3:56am

Say he had come up to you and said, "Yo, Bmnie, I'm not that interested in

Photobucket

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Sat, 04-24-2010 - 9:29am

In your last post a month ago, he told you you're not ready for a relationship and neither is he but it doesn't sound like you want to listen to what he's telling you.

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2008
Sat, 04-24-2010 - 9:39am
you have only been dating him 2 months, geez, come on now. maybe just enjoy the time you to have together, and not analyze so much.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2009
Sat, 04-24-2010 - 4:22pm
thanks for the advice, but any thoughts on what i should do than.
should i just be freinds with him and dont have sex and just get to no eachother better that way? or not see him anymore and just work on myself?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2010
Sat, 04-24-2010 - 5:41pm

Bmnie, from all you do for this guy, it sounds like you really like him but you do not like the way you're being treated. And I agree, you're not getting enough back, and I would

Photobucket

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Sat, 04-24-2010 - 10:04pm

It

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2009
Tue, 05-04-2010 - 1:34am
ok so im still confused, i tried to just blow him off and not talk to him and finally he said maybe we can start dateing, so after that we spent almost everynight together and we started getting to no eachother pretty good. he told me alot about himself and i told him some very personal stuff about me, well everytime i trid to bring up about us dateing he wouldnt say much. so a few nights ago he wanted me to come over and meet his freind, so i did and at first everything was going good.
his freind was really nice infact me and him ended up talking to eachother most of the night cause the guy i was seeing (we will call him J) was drunk, anyway J kept hugging me and kissing me and his freind kept referring me as J's old lady, so i thought maybe J had told his freind that i was his girlfreind or something, well than things got worse, we all were talking and his freind said something about how j drinks to much and how in the past 2 weeks they have gone to the bar alot and how j tries to pick up girls and hits on them and gets turned down alot and j blew up and went on and on about how he dosent get turned down and how girls ask for his number and he could take any one of the home. and the whole time i was standing right there and he didnt even care and his freind kept starring at me like he was waiting to get a reaction out of me or something.
and i didnt no what to do so i just stood there and finally his freind left and so i went in his room to get my stuff so i could leave and he wouldnt let me leave, he kept telling me he wanted me to stay with him and i said no so than he locked his door and started pushing furniture in front of it so i couldnt leave. so instead of fighting with him i just layed down and he finally passed out and i left. the next day he didnt really text me that much but when he did he acted like nothing had happened, in which im thinking he dosent remember what happened so later on that night i told him that his true colors came out the other night and that he was a jerk and a player and i was done. and all he had to say was oh cool ok bye and i havent heard from him since. but now it bugs me that he hasnt even tried to contact me and i really liked him but obviousley he didnt care or like me at all. and now im hurt cause ive never been treated this way before by a guy and i dont no what to do? thanks for listening
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Tue, 05-04-2010 - 3:25am

Sorry it's come to this bmniel.

You say you don't know what to do now. Hon, there is only one thing to do: Learn from your experiences.

How about you tell us what you've learned and how to not get in the same situation again. If you're unsure, the answers are all in the wise advice you've been given here.