Sleepovers without sex?? Is he not attracted to me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2012
Sleepovers without sex?? Is he not attracted to me?
7
Mon, 01-30-2012 - 8:42am

I reconnected with a guy that I dated briefly before, but he seemed very guarded at that time.

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Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010

IMO he has listened to you and thinks that sex will mar the friendship and bring on an agenda he is not ready for.

dragowoman

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007

I'm thinking that either

a) he's following your lead about being 'just friends'.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2010

I'd take his words at face value, particularly since you indicated you just wanted to reconnect as friends. He might want to proceed cautiously as a result. If you want more, try

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2008

I agree with the others -- I would believe him when he says he wants to take it slow, especially since he's been considerate towards you.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2011
As a guy, I don't buy the reason as being completely true. Unless you said over and over and kept reinforcing recently that you could only be friends would there be a reason for him to hold back based on that. All of my serious relationships developed from friendships; however, any woman who was laying alone next to me for the night, was there because I was attracted to her and not for cuddling times with a buddy. And 15 minutes of cuddling would be considered an achievement - we are not wired to just lay next to a female for long. There doesn't appear to be any religious concerns that he has mentioned. So while he does sound very respectful of you and a guy who is interested in the mental connection of things too, I would also highly suspect that he has a low sex drive and maybe even some equipment malfunctions at times that might make him nervous.
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Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010

JT some guys take one's words at face value.

dragowoman

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2007

If you were born in 1976, that would make you about 36, and presumably the guy is about the same.