Why did he freak out?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2011
Why did he freak out?
Wed, 01-02-2013 - 9:52pm

Why would a guy

-you dated for two years

-who said he loved you in the past

-who just bought you expensive Christmas presents

-who seemed as if everything was going the way he wanted in a relationship (not fighting and a lot of fun!)

-who says he only has eyes for you

-who says that you are in an exclusive relationship

-who says that you're a couple

-says he loves you when you tell him first

SUDDENLY FREAK OUT (when you started asking questions about the future of your relationship) AND

then say he's not sure if he loves you, doesn't want to ever get married and then leaves you apartment (not living together) with all his belongs at your house...... within a matter of minutes?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2012
Sat, 01-19-2013 - 11:36pm

It's probably a waste of time to wonder "why" he freaked out. You simply need to acknowledge the fact that he freaked out and respond accordingly. Dating other men is the answer. You should start exploring other options.  

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2011
Thu, 01-03-2013 - 10:24am
Hugs back to you for what you've been through. My bf and I are in our late 40's and both have been married before. His ended after 17 years when he found her cheating. He has disappeared on me before but for the past 7 months all has been great....or at least I thought. I keep going over our past to look for signs that would have told me he was "freaking out" again. I know I want to grow old with someone and get married again. I was hoping that he wanted to do that with me, however, I can't make him feel for me or want to get married so I am moving on. My heart is breaking but I feel very strong this time around. Good luck to you and I'm happy that you have found PEACE!
Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001
Wed, 01-02-2013 - 11:33pm


I am not too sure what's going on...

I had a b/f I dated and I wanted to know where we stand, he had told me we had no FUTURE together.

I accepted that, it was very hard but decided I needed/wanted to move on.

He was going to give me a ring at friend's house but ended up giving it to me early...it said best friends...the friends we were going to are nice this was a few years ago but she was an ex of his, kind of weird he wanted to give it to me in front of them, almost as weird as us possibly spending the night there...kwim?...I said he could but I was not comfortable with that.

This year I am single it's hard but after ALL I have been through recently Peaceful!

Do you know why he is so against marriage?...Did he tell you where he is going?...Is he back?...Did he go home?

I am simply baffled by his actions/behaviour, and I cannot imagine how you feel...