yes, no, maybe so?????

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-12-2010
yes, no, maybe so?????
5
Mon, 06-07-2010 - 4:25pm
well, here it is: we're both grownups, been dating a couple of months. trying to take it slow, but have been spending nearly every nite together, have met his parents, friends, he introduces me as his girlfriend, etc. then "suddenly" (insert ominous music here) he's making all these plans that do not include me (e.g. guys' weekend, guys' trip) whilst not seeming to make much of an effort to make cool plans with me, or if we do see each other when we planned, it's not WHAT we planned--like "oh, we'll go out on the town" and then when we do get together it's like "sorry 'bout not doing the town, babe, i'm just so tired and have to get up early for (you guessed it) my guys' trip.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-12-2010
Tue, 06-08-2010 - 12:48pm

i dunno...maybe it has happened more than i realize and after having a weird week last week it just sort of came to a head for me...i feel like maybe it's been a bit too much too soon (we just can't seem to help ourselves, and it's not just sex, which is weird, it's kind of about the closeness and comfort and talking and holding and all kinds of crazy "meaningful" stuff which is weirding me out majorly), and so maybe we both need a chance to stop and catch our breath.


saw each other last nite, it was nice in a low-key way, very natural, yes i stayed over and this morning was very sweet...he made plans to at least talk or see each other tonite, all very "normal" and natural...i guess i'm just worried that now that this bf/gf thing is like some acknowledged thing that we'll turn into an old married couple and the playful part is over?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Tue, 06-08-2010 - 8:51am

If you've been dating a couple of months then it's possible the first impressions are wearing down and you're getting to know the real guy underneath who has not much to prove to you. It sounds like he's a guy's-guy and values his friendships first in his life. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but it does raise a question of compatibility.

I'm also interested to know how many plans he's broken with you because of a guy's trip. I understand your perception of it is that he's doing it all the time, making "all of these plans", and doing this often enough to really bug you, but I'd like to be able to put it in perspective as an outside observer.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Tue, 06-08-2010 - 7:37am

I also would like to know if this is something he always does or are you talking about one time?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Mon, 06-07-2010 - 6:03pm
Lollipop, is this one weekend you're upset about....or is it an ongoing issue?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2010
Mon, 06-07-2010 - 5:02pm

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