Rehearsal Dinner

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anonymous user
Registered: 12-31-1969
Rehearsal Dinner
Thu, 08-23-2012 - 2:47pm

My son is getting married later this year. Being the mother of the groom, I'm planning the rehearsal dinner. My son mentioned to me that the bride's grandfather is coming to the rehearsal dinner but doesn't feel comfortable letting us pay for his meal. I asked him why the grandfather is coming in the first place - the rehearsal dinner is supposed to be for people who are in the wedding party, and parents only. Apparently, the bride is very intent on havng him there. This presents a problem because we have several sets of grandparents in town, as well as step-grandparents. If we have her grandpa there, then I have to invite my dad and step mom, my mom and step-dad, and my in-laws. We also have great-grandparents who live in town. What about them? The cost will get crazy out of hand, and we're already working on a tight budget. I understand that her grandfather is (apparently) offering to pay for himself, but how does that even work? We're doing a catered-style dinner in a restaurant. So does that mean I tell the rest of the grandparents that they're welcome to come but they have to pay for their own food? That seems tacky to me. And does her grandpa order from a separate menu, or eat from the catered food and reimburse us? It just seems wrong.

I have a feeling that her grandfather being un-invited (because apparently it's a "given" to him that he's coming) is going to cause a huge problem, but at the same time, I honestly can't afford to stretch the budget to include another 6+ people.

I don't know what to do.

Avatar for deenow17
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
In reply to:
Tue, 09-18-2012 - 10:31pm
I'm also a MOG & I can't understand why you don't have the grandparents there. We are looking at a set menu for when we do our dinner next May & will be inviting those in the wedding party, their partners, the grandparents & any out of town guests. It's how we handle it in our family.