One Year Anniversary

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
One Year Anniversary
6
Thu, 03-27-2003 - 8:50am
Today is the one year anniversary of my dads death. All week I kept thinking about how he was a year ago today and today and today. Is that normal? Add to that the fact that DH's mom died a few weeks ago and DD's miscarriage and I seem to be in a blue funk. I'm hoping that once these events get a little further in the past I'll climb out of this mood. Life just seems a little heavy right now. I'm constantly on the verge of tears. DDIL made me a family/mothers bracelet a few weeks ago. We included "Bubbet", the baby we thought was coming. Now since DD has miscarried, I had asked to have Bubbets birth stone removed. She ordered some charms for the store and included an angel praying over a crib. DDIL asked if she should put that charm on the bracelet. I burst into tears...right at work. Bummer. I hope I can shake this mood soon. I HATE feeling this way. Life is too short to be depressed very long. I suppose I'll give it a week or 2 and then talk to the dr. if I don't straighten out. Psalms 23 says we have to go 'through' the valley. Not stop 'in' the valley. I'm hopeing I'm about through. I don't plan on stopping where I'm at. There is too much good and too much to be thankful for to stay this way. I guess the 'low' makes the 'high' better. I'm really going to try to work my way out of this..starting tomorrow, after the anniversary date. Thanks for letting me ramble this morning. Teresa, in blue.

 

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Registered: 03-18-2000
Thu, 03-27-2003 - 10:00am
You're loved one's physical bodies aren't still here but they're with you & wouldn't want you to mourn. Easter will be here soon with it's joyous message.

Comforting hugs & love, Chris

 


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Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 03-27-2003 - 10:57am
Teresa, anniversary dates are hard. The first year anniversary of my mom's death was rough. They say time heals all wounds. And I think the more time passes the easier it gets. We will never forget the people in our lives who have gone on. Take all the time you need to feel whatever you have to feel.

Hugs and love, Ellen

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The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 03-27-2003 - 11:00am
Hi (((Teresa)))

I still grieve for Mia Faith and it will be three years in April since she passed away. I still grieve for my folks, for my nephew, for my sis in law...there is no time limit on grief. You have had a lot to deal with recently...and that is why this is hitting you so hard right now. You are right about going to see your doctor if you don't start feeling better soon. You may need an anti depressant to help you get through this.

I wonder if you are up to seeing me and maybe Joanne this Monday? I want to come and pick up the bracelet if your DDIL has it ready and get something for Miss Ester's birthday when I go there next month. If you are not up to being a tour guide or if you are going to be too busy, I will understand, but thought Joanne would like to see what she missed the last time. We can just browse by ourselves if we have to. Can you tell me if the bracelet is ready and if you all are open on Monday?

I want to give you an extra special hug from one grandma to another, because I do feel your pain. If you ever need to talk, or just need a hug, please don't hesitate to call or email me.

Love, Sandi

 
Avatar for dovie2000
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 03-27-2003 - 11:18am
(((Hugs, Teresa))), remember the second part of that phrase from the 23rd psalm, "I will fear no evil, for thou art with me. Thy rod and thy staff will comfort me". You will climb out of this valley you are in. It's very understandable that you would be in a blue funk right now. First anniversaries are hard. I think some part of us always grieves for those we lose. I know it's been 17 years since my Dad died, and I still 'clutch' occasionally when I think about him. And given the added circumstances with losing DMIL recently, and Jennifer's miscarriage, you are carrying a heavier burden right now. Cry if you need to, it helps to let it out.

The sun will shine again, and you will feel joy again.... Sending hugs and prayers that God will lift the shadows for you. Dovie


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Avatar for cl_geeliz
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 03-27-2003 - 5:02pm
Sending {{{{HUGE, tender, comforting HUGGS}}}} Teresa! Been there, when I lost four relatives in one year. March 1st marked 4 years since my DD passed away, and I've struggled with tears most of this month. A darling little stuffed puppy that I gave her in the Las Vegas Hospital is sitting on my tower; he fell off today and believe it or not, I cried, as I put him back up there. Somehow, I have to toughen my soul or I'd put him back in the bedroom, up on the very top of the entertainment center, but why should I? A good cry now and then is healthy....hurtful, but healthy....I'm sure that's how we find a certain amount of closure and healing.

You've had a real tough row to hoe lately, Teresa, and I don't need to re-remind you what you're going through. Each of us here knows; each of us extends our individual words of support comfort, and hope to you today and in the days to come. You have so much strength, but still, you needed this time to open up and lay everything down onscreen for us to come rescue you, and comfort your hurting heart. God bless you for putting your feelings down here, for how can we help you through some of this if we don't know?

Sending extra prayers to you on this beautiful PNW spring day, to hopefully shed some light into your gray day. HUGGS....

º°geeliz

 


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Registered: 10-16-2002
Thu, 03-27-2003 - 5:58pm
Teresa, every year at Thanksgiving my DH and I go through the same thing. We tend to snap at each other more and don't want to really get involved with anything. And a song can bring me to my knees in tears. It is hard. It does get a bit more 'detached' after a time. The memories tend to be more of the good things and less of the days surrounding the loss. With the war on top of your own grief, it is perfectly understandable for you to feel the way you are feeling. Things will get better. I can send you hugs and little else, but I do relate entirely to what you are feeling and hope the sun shines again for you soon.

Dianne

 




 

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