best friends new boyfriend is not good

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2003
best friends new boyfriend is not good
3
Fri, 11-07-2003 - 9:19pm
please can someone give me some adive on what to do with this situation. here it is my best friend 43 years old introudce me to to her new boy friend and i didnt care for him and i let her know my opion because she ask me because the way he treats her and the kids mine and her and his manners all theat intales Then she got really mad at me about it. she had stop talking with me. everything we both watch the children becasue we work 2 different shifts and the kids have grown up together they are 11 both of them boy and a girl and they dont like him either but they cant say that to her because she would be upset. we are now finally talking again. THE ONLY PROLEM IS THAT I FOUND OUT SOME INFORMATION ABOUT THE NEW BOYFRIEND THAT HE HAS A CRIMAL RECORD AND IS ON PROBATION THIS CONCERN ME ABOUT THE KIDS AND HER BUT IAM WORRIED THAT SHE WILL BE MAD THAT HAVE I CHECK ON HIM WITH OUT HER KNOWING BUT SHE MEET HIM ON THE INTERNET WHICH IS NOT BAD BUT SHE SAID SHE WAS IN LOVE ONLY AFTER 2 DAYS WHICH I THINK IS LUST LOL BUT I DONT WANT TO LOSE HER FRIENDS OVER TELLSING WHAT SHOULD I DO ESPECIALLY IF THEY DECIDE TO GET MARRIED. PLEASE HELP ME DECIDE TO TELL HER OR NOT THANK YOU
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 11-08-2003 - 3:39am

Hello Pvysnoopy,

CL-Caroline_01

       Email me! @ werlecar@

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2003
Tue, 11-11-2003 - 6:45am
I would have to agree with the CL on this one, unless you have found out that this man is a murderer or child molester, who could put the children in great danger!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 11-12-2003 - 12:44pm
I will go out on a limb here and say you MIGHT want to tell her--she will probably stop speaking to you, maybe forever, but if his criminal record is serious enough, perhaps someday she will realize that you just wanted her to have the facts to protect her and her children. While it is true that usually you do have to let friends find out for themselves that they have a bad one, this may be the exception. Just wiegh his record against her never speaking to you again, and if you realize that it (his record)is not that serious and not a threat to her or her children, than don't meddle in it.

If they break up and she comes to you, don't speak ill of him, just let her know how totally there for her you are.