can you help me become a bitch?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
can you help me become a bitch?
6
Thu, 09-25-2003 - 5:17am
Hello everyone!

I could really use your help.

If there's anyone who read <> by Sherry Argov,can you send me some general information about what to do??

I've heard this book is amazing,and i met this guy...we 've been on a few dates and i want to know what to do from now on,based on the advice given in this book.

I would like to know,how often do i see him,what about the sex part and how to move on and general behaviour guidelines.

I also follow the Rules but i heard this book has great advice too.

I really like this guy.Keep in mind that he does all the work(calling,arranging dates and stuff)but he is really busy with his work and has a big ego too.He generally shows his affection to me and he pursues me.

Please tell me what to do next.

Love to all.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 09-25-2003 - 4:40pm

I have to say that while I've never heard of this book, you're subject line caught my eye. I'm not sure you need to be a "bitch" necessarily. I think being assertive, confident and aggressive at the right times will win any man's heart.


How do you do that? Well, it's not always easy. You need to be confident in yourself. You are IT girl! You're beautiful, intelligent and any man who isn't after you is crazy! Once that confidence starts showing, you will automatically become more assertive (because you get results) and more aggressive (because you feel good about yourself).


So personally, I think CONFIDENCE, not BITCHINESS, is the key.

*Rebecca*

Rebecca
Loving wife to David (3-2

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Fri, 09-26-2003 - 8:25am
Yur advice has been very helpful.

I really feel confident about myself.Just sometimes when you reaaally like someone it's difficult not to show your feelings very much.

I'm just so used to see my friends crying and suffering about some guy,and i think i don't want to get through this,so i have to be more objective and not so emotional -at least at the beginning of the relationship-Women tend to give to much even to people who don't deserve it.

I wanna give only to those who deserve my love and to those who need me....
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-12-2003
Sat, 09-27-2003 - 1:18pm


My boyfriend told me once that the best thing I did for our relationship was the fact I never wanted him (as I never showed how much I wanted to be with him)which at the time was partially true since I didn't find him that interesting at first. Now, if you are actually crazy about someone it's harder (ha ha) but it can be done with some restraint. Don't ever become dependent on a man and then who really needs to be a bitch. You'll be contempt within yourself to NEED someone so badly and a strong man will appreciate that. As the other person said: Confidence is what being a bitch really stands for.

I do know however how difficult it can be to be confident, there are so mant things to be insecure about these days. We should start a seperate thread on how to be confident.

As for that book, sounds like another marketing strategy, beware of catchy anything in this consumer driven world. Who agrees?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2003
Sun, 09-28-2003 - 10:01pm

Hi there, Milena!


Welcome to the board, we're happy to have you with us. I have to say, your subject line caught me off guard for a moment...LOL, not because I'm a prude, mind you...just wasn't expecting it!


As for following books of that nature, I'm not sure I'm in total agreeance with that policy, I've seen too many people fall into that trap, letting books, or other people's methods, define them. In my opinion, your best bet is to be yourself. Assertiveness, confidence, and a good esteem are some key components in helping a gal play "hard to get" without playing a game, you know? Just my opinion.


If you want to follow these books, and I have to admit, the one about men loving bitches, sounds interesting....I would strongly suggest only using the advice within as a guide, not as a set way. You are your own individual, and no book, or set of rules is going to define ALL of you. You said you really liked this guy, so go with that, don't play too many games, or follow too many outside rules. I've also heard that guys, and gals for that matter, get tired of people who play too many games, too.


Good luck in your relationship with this fellow, keep us posted, and feel free to bring any other topics of interest, as well!


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2003
Sun, 09-28-2003 - 10:53pm

Hi Milena,


I saw your post and I just had to respond!

Charmrainbow butterfly
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Mon, 09-29-2003 - 1:27pm
Thank you all for your advice.

I really think i must work with my self and definately my confidence.

Lately whenever i don't have something to do or somewhere to go,i really feel so awful and i have no idea where this is coming from.

It's like that when i am alone,every single negative emotion within me,comes up,whereas when i'm around people,i make them laugh and i'm cheerful all the time.

I really want to do something...but i don't know where to start.When i'm at home,i think about (why doesn't he call,or i have nothing to do,i'm bored)and i get depressed.

College starts i need to find a job and i have to get the energy to do that....

Any advice??