I do it all and I'm tired of it...
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|Thu, 09-25-2003 - 4:27pm|
I feel like I truly do it all. I'm a mom of a 5.5 y/o, I work at home (2 jobs), we own a dog, I am married, we own a house and I take care of everyone and everything. In my early 30s now, I shouldn't be this tired all the time. Sometimes I wonder if I have CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome). But then I realize, it can't be CFS. I am just constantly moving, constantly doing and not sleeping as much as I used to. I wish I could get more sleep, but I wake up every morning at 6 a.m. (not because I choose to, because I have to) and go to bed at 11 p.m. My DH hasn't always been the most understanding guy, so when I tell him I need some more sleep and want to turn in early, he gets upset and makes me feel guilty. He tells me he never gets to spend time with me alone and staying up until 11 allows us that time. Plus, he doesn't want to deal with the dog by himself (she's MY dog), so he complains about doing that, too. I seriously need some time for ME, but don't have the time to even think about what I'd do!
I have found myself yelling more at my child because I'm stressed out. I've asked my DH to help out, but he refuses or has a reason why he can't. Some of the stress I feel is because of him and his lack of respect and responsibility. Unfortunately, I can't change him. I can only change me and what I do. I can't give up my jobs or my house, or my dog, or my son. I just don't know what to do!
Thanks for letting me vent. Maybe you all can offer some encouraging words for me. I'm ready to pull my hair out and run away to the circus!