New to board... need some feedback!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2011
New to board... need some feedback!
5
Tue, 08-02-2011 - 5:28pm

Hi Ladies!

I'm new to this board, so please let me know if I'm in the wrong place.... I am 33 and just want to chat with some unbiased women in my age group who might be able to relate to how I'm feeling. Not sure if I'll use the right terminology- so feel free to on-board me.

I'm kind of all over the place with my worries and issues, so bear with me (although I'm hoping none of them are so uncommon). Let me start by giving you a quick run-down of my situation: once again, I'm 33. I have a job that I actually went to school for (fashion), I have a great boyfriend that I've been living with for about a year (been together a little over 2 years), but we're not engaged or married and we have no children. But he's the one, for sure. Recently, the baby boom hit all around me. My sister got pregnant, and then literally 10 other close friends around me quickly became pregnant as well. I have only a few friends left that are not married and/or pregnant.

I was raised in the Midwest to a somewhat traditional family- and I was definitely on a traditional "track" in my 20's, except that I didn't meet Mr. Right and get married. When I turned 30 and was still single, I decided to throw the rule book out the window and just let life unfold around me as it would. I truly embraced being single and being a little outside the norm, compared to everyone around me. 2 1/2 years ago, I

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2008
Fri, 08-05-2011 - 8:53am

Although I think it's great that you're really thinking about this before jumping into anything, I just want to say, you may regret not having kids but you will never regret having them.

That being said, it is still not a decision you want to take lightly.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-07-2000
Thu, 08-04-2011 - 9:18am
I don't think there is ever a perfect time to have a baby. I know that if I thought about it too much, I could find more reasons NOT to have a baby than reasons TO have one.

I had my first at 27 and my second at 31. Both were planned, but it doesn't mean I think I was totally ready. Having kids definitely changes things, and you don't realize exactly how much until it's happened.

I agree that I don't think this is an answer that anyone else can give you. I think it's good that you're thinking about it, though. I think there are too many people having kids who don't think it through, and it's the kids who suffer for it.
Community Leader
Registered: 06-27-2006
Wed, 08-03-2011 - 2:12pm

It's all just personal preference.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2011
Wed, 08-03-2011 - 12:00pm

Well thank you!

I appreciate the reply. Yes, I've talked to my boyfriend about our future, and he says he wants to have kids eventually- but he doesn't seem to be on any kind of timeline for that to happen. It's like a thing that just

Community Leader
Registered: 06-27-2006
Tue, 08-02-2011 - 10:42pm

First, I want to welcome you to the board.