My BF's missed my 40th B-day - so upset - am I overreacting?

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Registered: 12-31-1969
My BF's missed my 40th B-day - so upset - am I overreacting?
Sat, 09-01-2012 - 11:12am
It was a big birthday year and both my BF's missed it. I am not mad at them -- life goes on. One missed it completely and the other texted me the day of saying she was at a play in the city all day. They wound up both calling late the next day to apologize - one said she was in the city all day at a play and restaurant and other that it was a crazy week. One has two small children and the other is single. I did not expect them to come and see me -- especially the one with children -- too challenging for her. 
I guess I felt as if one could make time for a play or other activities she could have made time for a 5 minute phone call. I would never berate them or yell at them for this -- it is just not my style. I know you can't make people spend time with you or show you that they care if they have other priorities. Life gets busy. 
I am trying so hard not to be upset and to understand how crazy life can be. I have called them back and just keep missing them -- although I am not trying too hard to catch them on the phone so now we are playing phone tag. They have always told me how special I am to them and how much they appreciated the support I provided to them over life's issues. Am I overreacting?
Avatar for nawleansdarlin
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-1999

I don't think it would hurt anything to bring up the fact that it kind of hurt that they missed your birthday.  You could tell them that you aren't angry but it did hurt you that they missed your birthday.  Even a birthday text would have been good enough.  My brother and I hardly ever speak but on our birthday's we manage to send each other a simple text it just says "Happy Birtday, Sis"  Or in my case, "Happy Birthday, Bro".  I don't think it is too much to ask to hear or read Happy Birthday from a good friend. 

I wish you a belated Happy Birthday. 


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2012
What ae you doiing wih two boyfriends? Or is that best-friends? Either way... No! There is no excuse, birthdays are important, that's why we were born on those days. :)