CL of May-December Relationships
Visit me at That Yank In... and Traveling with That Yank
For me it been both and I've always been pleased with how things turned out.
Oh yes, certainly, and in both ways.
What I usually ask for is safety - whether I am starting on a trip, negotiating with people, looking into a new job. I ask that if it's good for me, to open the doors and let things happen. If it isn't good for me, to not let it happen even if I am working hard on it and it looks good on paper.
Sometimes it doesn't make any sense though!