It's been almost 3 months...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2008
It's been almost 3 months...
6
Mon, 10-24-2011 - 6:01pm

To make a long story short, I fell for a guy who was totally wrong for me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2008
Mon, 10-24-2011 - 10:19pm
Great to have you on the board, init4love2008!!

Sometimes, we get caught in situations that leave us with feelings that are hard to explain. It is not ridiculous that you are having these feelings. It is ridiculous that your TRUE feelings got wasted on a FAKE guy. You were in the relationship for the right reasons but you received the wrong treatment. We are always taking chances with love because you never know how it is going to turn out. I really hate that this had to happen to you but you can take a valuable lesson from it. Even though it might sound good and look good, it's not always good for you.

Eventually, you will be able to go about without him being on your mind. The feelings will begin to fade and you will be able to start fresh. Do take a break for awhile before you get serious and be cautious of the next guy. You don't deserve another heartbreak!! :)

Do you feel that the dates didn't work because you are still thinking of him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2008
Mon, 10-24-2011 - 10:33pm

Thanks for your reply pricessb07!

I'm not sure if the dates didn't work out because I was thinking of him or if they just weren't the right guys.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2008
Mon, 10-24-2011 - 11:07pm
May I ask how old you are? I just turned 23 Saturday and I am on boyfriend #2. Boyfriend #1, aka ex-fiance, was my first love and highschool sweetheart. I met him when I was 14 and was with him until I broke the engagement at 21. I missed out on a lot of teen activities because he was controlling. Everytime I would go somewhere, he would call me constantly and embarass me in front of my friends. I endured a lot of pain but I made it over. I made it over in such a short period of time because my feelings were gone before the relationship officially ended. Love is out there and will fnd it's way to you. We just have to keep our hopes up and keep looking. The guy I'm with now is better but has some ways also. I would love to be married if the right guy came along...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2008
Tue, 10-25-2011 - 7:14am

I am 28 years old and I have had a few relationships throughout my 20s.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Wed, 10-26-2011 - 10:16am

It's totally normal and VERY common to fall for the wrong guy. Don't beat yourself up because you aren't able to immediately change your feelings. Feelings exist completely separately from logic or rational thought. They will fade with time. You should be really proud of yourself for at least being able to see things clearly - Many women in your situation would be trying to get the jerk back.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2008
Sat, 10-29-2011 - 6:27pm
Sometimes I do feel proud of myself for breaking it off and doing the right thing. But there is a small part of me that secretly wants to talk to him again and wishes he was here. I accidentally stumbled across his facebook profile the other day and there was a picture of him and his girlfriend looking really happy. That really stung.

A friend of mine was talking about him this weekend. He said he really liked him and thought he was a good guy. I was like, how could this guy be a good guy when he cheated on his gf and showed no remorse? My friend said the way he acted towards me was nice and that's why he thought he was a good guy. I'm so confused.

I can't say I haven't thought about contacting him again. I sometimes think maybe we could be friends and I was too hard on him. But I'm afraid of what will happen when I do. Either he will talk to me and I'm afraid I'll get roped back in again or he won't care.

I've dropped this guy out of my life but I can't get him out of my mind :(