Man that is Offlimits

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Man that is Offlimits
11
Thu, 03-27-2003 - 3:28pm
Hi - I'm 27 and a professional. I have been in love for 22 months with my friend, named "O" who I used to work with. Last month he separated from his wife with whom he had problems for years. He has an apartment and is living a mile from my house. (! yay!) One would think this is a good thing, which might give us a chance... However, he is pushing me away and dealing with his pain in that most unusual way of being emotionally unavailable when he previously gave me all he had emotionally. We really aren't friends anymore, despite the fabulous chance we have to be more than friends now.

I realize I should give him space, but I want him. And I feel like I am crunched for time (all my friends are married and pregnant) and I don't want to lose him because we both agree that each other is our "dream mate". He still calls me 5 times a day and IMs me plenty, but does not want to see me in the evenings for dinner or a drink any more. I guess I should move past the hope for this epic, incredible love with the most intelligent, witty, sensitive man alive, and instead settle for someone who might be more emotionally available. I would hate to give up too early. What should I do? Any advice is appreciated.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-03-2003 - 2:39pm
Ok, I'm going to be firm here..... ARE YOU NUTS??? Don't go out with him Sat. night!!!! I know you want to... I know you probably think about him alot and want to be around him. But, you've realized he's not good for you... and he basically agreed with you. The last thing you need is to be around him. You'll get sucked back in!! Go out with some friends, get him off your mind. You need time away to get over him. Sorry, but that's tough love for ya! Well... let me know what you decide to do! ;)

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