iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2009
Wed, 05-13-2009 - 12:10am
My Dad is a drug addict. Has been ALL MY LIFE!!! I could write a disertation(sp?). He got "clean" about 10 yrs ago. After some time, we all started letting our guards down again, but in the back of our minds we all knew it wasnt over. His personality never really changed he just threw himself into work and substituted one addiction for another. He has NEVER been to blame for his own life and decisions. And still is not to blame. He has recently gone back to drugs, just in a different way. Used to be a crack head, now he pops pills all day every day and stays lit out of his mind. I though I forgave him a long time ago, but I was SOOOOO wrong. I hate him now more than i EVER have. My best friend lost her mother 2 yrs ago to an overdose and i literelly envy her. Some days I wish he's just get it over with so my family could grieve and move on. I am so angry all the time. I HAVE GOT to get counseling but my ins sucks right now and I cant afford it. I am terrified that i may one day lose my temper with my daughter just simply because of how often i feel pissed off. I hate him for makign me feel this way. I coud rant and rant and rant but I think it will only serve to rev me up and make it dificult to sleep. Just looking for someone who feels the same way!
Britney (28) and Robert (31) TTC x 9 months with #1 Delivered a beautiful healthy daughter, Shalynn on 5/23/08 Been TTC since Feb 2010. MC 6/27/11
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2004
Wed, 05-13-2009 - 6:16am

Please check out the 12 step programs near you. They are donation, not fee. Usually people put in a dollar. There are some 12 Step programs for families and friends of addicts (Narc Anon) , but if there are none near you, you would be welcome at AlAnon.

Alcoholism and addiction are horrid, and the effects our use has on our families is tremendous.

Please, let us help too.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2003
Sat, 05-16-2009 - 8:39am