any success stories. or is it hopeless

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2007
any success stories. or is it hopeless
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 2:46pm
I have read most of the posts now and see this is a big problem with no clear solution. Does anyone have a success story out there. Can an alcoholic be helped without having to hit rock bottom which destroys many lives.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2003
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 5:06pm

Hi sickinside,

Please know that rock bottom is not the end...but the beginning.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2004
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 7:04pm

In 1987, after losing a career and marriage, a young (23 year old) man walked into AA. He is now 43, sober for 20 continuous years, and my DH.

In 1989, I walked into AA and haven't left.

We married in 1992.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 7:48pm

Hi there!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2001
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 8:28am

HI Sickinside,

Big problem sure, hope for solution----absolutely.


A Friend in Recovery


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2007
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 5:30pm
Thanks for the input. I am still wavering. I went to the couthouse today to file the domestic violence charge, and to get an injunction. Why I was still concerned about how he would feel about me doing this I just don't know. They tell me that this could affect his job. The good news is they could put him into a alcohol and substance abuse program, and also a battery program, or anger management. So either it will help or make him hate me forever. I decided that's the chance I'll have to take. I covered for him for years now. I know feel like an idiot for doing so. The state attorney guy kept asking me what I wanted from all this.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2006
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 8:25pm

hello! I don't want to be the voice of negativity ... but I have to wonder if some people just NEVER hit Rock Bottom. I wish my husband would hit. It's hard to hear someone say they drank for 33 years and then hit RB. Cuz I've only been married for 14 ... so how much longer will this go on?

I KNOW I need to Let Go. I am working on it. I am coming to terms with the fact that I cannot and do not trust my husband to meet pretty much ANY of my needs. So ... knowing that - do I just keep trudging on?

And obviously NO ONE person can ever meet ALL of my needs. Maybe I am too needy? I don't know where the line is? I don't know what I should EXPECT my husband to be to me and what I shouldn't expect him to be to me. He has let me down and disappointed me in so many ways. People do that, I know ... but it's hard to come to terms with when it's the person I chose to be my "partner."

I wish something outrageous would happen so I could leave easily, instead of this slow descent into alcoholism. It raises my threshold each time he disappoints me :-( I guess a new Lower standard is set each time. When do I say when?

My grandfather drank till the day he died. I think maybe some people don't ever hit Rock Bottom.