Boys & Puberty?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2003
Boys & Puberty?
4
Tue, 11-29-2005 - 12:15pm

Okay, you moms with boys who are already in their teens, I need some insight on the whole boy puberty thing. Being a female, I knew pretty much what to expect with DD, but am a bit puzzled with DS these days.

He's pushing 12 -- 6th grade, in middle school. Aside from normal body odor, I see absolutely no outward physical signs of puberty. But boy! he is one moody kid all of a sudden. One hour he is a sweet, silly little boy and the next, a grumpy old man, barking at everyone and hating everything (especially school). I expected the mood swings from DD -- do boys do that too? I have an older brother and I just don't remember this.

And his appetite concerns me. While he IS getting taller, he is also chubby and that does not seem to be changing much in spite of now daily PE. Could be because he eats all the time! Do all boys do that? I can't figure if he really is hungry or just bored. And I don't know that he knows which one it is either. I remember reading a post a long time ago about boys and their appetites but his, combined with his weight, makes me wonder if its normal.

We live in kind of a bum neighborhood in that kids don't run around and play outside much at all. Our neighborhood is hilly and riding bikes, roller blading or tossing a ball around just doesn't happen, so when he's home, he's inside -- snacking! His friends all seem to be the same way; when he invites one over, they play computer games, watch a movie, that sort of thing. But, like I said, where we live isn't conducive to outdoor play and we have a tiny yard.

Hope you can all share some BTDT experience!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-29-2003
Tue, 11-29-2005 - 12:55pm

Well, I've got one that is 12 and one that is 15. Puberty is a strange thing.......my oldest showed no 'outward' signs of puberty, but they were there..........hidden so to speak. The thing I noticed a change in first and foremost was 'private' areas. My oldest isn't terribly modest--so the changes were more evident dashing to the bathroom, and he was more open about it---mentioning things very quickly and I tried to respect his openness by not dwelling on it or obsessing where he could notice. See, I also feel ill equipped to deal with boys...........so there wasn't much body change that you would normally see....height, weight, etc......but it was there. Then the acne started. I never had bad acne, but my handsome boy suddenly had HORRIBLE, EXPLOSIVE acne. He needs prescriptions to control it-------his back is still really bad, but he only uses the topical treatment on his face. I'm going to take him to the dermotologist in Jan to see what else we can do. My concern is his growth. He's only about 5'6". At 15, I guess I expected him to be taller. Oh, he also started this process earlier than some of his buddies (again, outward signs.......obviously). This all began in 5th grade. (sigh) He now must shave DAILY and has a full beard (let me clarify--he doesn't wear a beard, but he could---full facial hair, I guess???)----he seems like such a baby still!!

My youngest, 12, also seemed younger than his buddies---but he's modest and has been since he was 10----this is my NAKED boy---he ran around naked until this point, so I can only assume some changes began at this point. Outwardly, I see rapid growth (unlike his brother). He's grown 4-5 inches in the last year---trimmed down substantially, and there is body hair and facial hair appearing--the need to remove the 'peach fuzz' periodically has started, and his voice has changed. He looks like a teen and acts like a little boy.....it is so bizarre.

My kids eat weirdly---there are times where they seem to be insatiable, but then times that they don't want to eat for long periods of time. Both boys were scrounging for food an HOUR after thanksgiving.................wow. We ate at 1 and I personally didn't eat again til breakfast the next day. They both ate McDonalds at 7:pm after we had a huge meal. My oldest orders enough food for 3 and eats all of it sometimes, then the next time orders it and only eats a small amount.........it's weird.

anyway, there is no rhyme or reason w/ puberty. It hits and you don't even know it. Suddenly you son will stretch and yawn and there is underarm hair, and you wonder....how did THAT get there................there is no NORMAL and no set 'rules'.

as far as mood swings..............I'm guessing they are no different than girls....I don't have girls to compare too, but let me tell you...............they are there with a vengance..........my oldest is worse, but I somehow feel like we'll get more from my youngest as time goes on.

I wonder all the time about this process................I worry about my oldest and his height, will he take a growth spurt at this late date?

It sounds like your son is starting it all........good luck!! Oh, and yes, they get weird with their appearance and get all weird about friends and girlfriends..........it's like a girl in a boy's body.........strange.

Shels

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Tue, 11-29-2005 - 1:29pm

yup - sounds like its starting. and boys can get as moody as girls... they all go thru hormonal upheavals.


i think some of the boys get chubbyish at this age - but you want to make sure he doesn't gain weight and get fat - and OTOH you don't want to make it a BIG issue. the best thing to do is make sure you have plenty of healthy meals and snacks, make sure that you (parents) show the kids (thru personal examples) how to have a healthy lifestyle, discuss food pyramids and amounts of foods (i notice that some

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2000
Tue, 11-29-2005 - 1:40pm

Your ds sounds like he's on the same 'puberty pattern' that mine were on.

Pam
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 11-29-2005 - 5:32pm

My oldest hit it hard it 6th grade-huge growth spurts and the stretch marks to show it! He had an emergency appendectomy and, understandably, would not let the nurses sponge bathe him. He insisted waiting for me and when I pulled back the sheet and saw what I hadnt seen for awhile-I can only imagine the look on my face-LOL

Number two was so tiny we were at a pediatric endocrinologist at age 3. Nothing unusual came up and they told us to hope for a late puberty which would give him a better change at more normal height. DH and I were measured(thankfully not weighed)and our average was teh 75th%; he was at the 10%. He did indeed hit puberty later- sophomore year in high school and even then its been a slow and steady thing-not whoosh!

He'll be 18 next month and is 5-9 which doesnt hit ds1's 6-1 but is far better than we had hoped for in the early days(he wasnt JUST the tiniest in his class-he was stick out like a sore thumb tiny) And he might still edge up another inch-who knows?

DS3 began in 7th grade-the face just got angular and I knew(it took 3 but I figured it out)I out and out asked if his private parts were changing and he gave a somewhat embrassed nod. I was pretty open with #2 because we were supposed to be monitoring his growth so I had a 'medical' reason but, honestly, I wouldnt hesitate to just ask-he might have questions

NOne of mine have much facial hair and this seemed to come last with all of them. DS1 had underarm hair at 10 which is TOTALLY out of the usual sequence though, so anything is possible!

Both DH and I are overweight and all our kids are skinny as can be. I guess we eat it before they get a chance ;)

I agree to keep only healthy snacks around and dont obsess too much about 'he might be in a growth spurt-I cant deny him!!!'. You dont deny him-you just make X amount of hamburgers and, if he is still hungry when they're gone, you pass the salad or green beans

He might be interested in weight training-kind of a 'guy' thing and while it isnt aerobic it might just spur his interest if he gets some immediate results.

I made a deal with myself that I could only do internet if I worked with hand weights-really toned my arms. Of course I didnt stick with it and they are flab again but...there might be some little incentive for him this way and you dont have to say 'to lose weight' you can use some puberty means muscle grows fast-lets take advantage suggestion