Well, I did it!!!!!!
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| Wed, 01-04-2006 - 4:38pm |
When dd came home from school today, I told her I thought it was best to pull out of the carpool. You should have seen her face! I called both moms and, while it wasn't easy or pleasant, both conversations ended positively. A's mom was stunned - when she asked for specifics, I said "you must have noticed the atmosphere in the car is very tense" She replied "well, I notice they don't talk "as mucn" (!). I said (calmly) "They don't talk to D at all. When she pressed for details, I told her that maybe someday we could discuss it, but not now. C's mom was very upset - not as much for herself as that it happened at all, She kept asking about C specifially and I finally said that the situation simply became bigger than all the girls and I felt this was the only way to resolve it. I like both moms very much and I said to each of them that I felt, as adults, our relationship should not be affected by this. I hope that it is ture.
It looks like C will be taking the bus - and possibly A. That is one of the reasons the bus is not an option for my dd.
Dh isn't thrilled (because of the cost of gas and the fact that he may also be driving...I may be having knee surgery this winter), but he understands.
Dd said her response at school will be "it just wasn't working" and, if pressed, will likely blame her mean mother! That's fine with me.
This is a large impact on my life and my time, but I don't care.
Thanks to everyone who helped me reach this decision. Walking away isn't always the solution, but knowing when to walk away can make all the difference in the world.
jt

Yay! Congratulations -- sounds like you handled it perfectly. I'm sure your DD felt the same relief my did when she realized there was an 'out' to what had become an uncomfortable situation.
Best of luck during your commutes. You'll probably find it's a great time just to talk and chat with your DD, and maybe you can get some books on tape for the times your driving solo!
Thanks for sharing your good news!