HELP, 13 yr. old won't do school work.

Avatar for gonecadd
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
HELP, 13 yr. old won't do school work.
1
Wed, 01-11-2006 - 10:54pm

Hi all.
Our DS is in the 7th grade. He has struggled thru school pretty much since 1st grade. When he does his work he does well it's just getting him to do it which is the problem.
I am so frustrated and don't know what to do. :(
We have tried taking away his privliges but that doesn't seem to help.
I got a call from the assistant priciple today because one of his teachers is fed up and doesn't know what to do anymore. (me either!)

He just doesn't seem to care.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2005
Thu, 01-12-2006 - 6:30am

My DSS is the same way (he's 14) and he's been like that since we've had him living with us (consistently for the last 3 years). His bio mom never enforced homework or schoolwork, so I always attributed his lack of effort to the way he was raised for the first 11 years of his life. And he's like your DS - when he puts in the time and effort, he gets really good grades. We seem to go in cycles - he gets his progress report from school midway through the marking period, usually D's and F's with comments like "doesn't pay attention in class", "homework not turned in" (meanwhile, DH and I ask EVERY NIGHT if he has homework to do), etc. DH has a fit, takes away all DSS's priviledges (the phone, the radio and staying with friends seem to be the ones that hit the hardest), we give him the lecture on how important school is even though it doesn't really seem that way now...then DSS is all depressed and mopey for a week or so, then the report card comes in, usually with mostly B's, at which point he gets some reward (taking him to some event he wants to go to, getting him a new CD or something like that). I don't like this roller-coaster way of dealing with the issue, but that seems to be the habit we've all fallen into and can't get out of.

Good luck - I'll be looking to see if anyone has a more practical solution!

Jane