Well, it finally happened!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2003
Well, it finally happened!
3
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 3:43pm

My 17 year old son (soon to be 18) has officially been kicked out of school. He has shown no interest in this semester and refuses to go. I've done everything I possibly can to encourage and even brow-beat him but it has done no good - he's missed too many classes. The school has even gone out of their way to give him extra chances but even that didnt help. My son has always hated school and because he hates the classes he has, just saw no reason to get up and go. I am so upset and disheartened. I guess now he must experience the real world and hopefully realize that fast food jobs are not going to get him far.

I have thought maybe he might be depressed but ruled it out. He seems happy in all other aspects of his life - just doesnt like the school thing. I still dont understand how he could not put in his 3 months and graduate. So now I guess instead of fighting with him about school it will be about getting a job.

SIGH - sorry, just had to vent somehow. This parenting thing is for the birds!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2006
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 4:58pm

Oh ... I'm so sorry! Here's a {hug} for you too. I have a nephew who seems to be headed down this road too and it is so sad!!! I feel like he's just throwing his future away and he doesn't even have it to throw away yet.

Will your DS at least try and get his GED over the summer? It seems that some teenagers just don't realize how important that diploma is and how not having it will detrimentally affect their lives in the future. My DB (he has been divorced from DN's mother for most of his life) says he is going to force him to go to summer school to get his GED if he doesn't graduate. I don't know how he plans to enforce that, but it seems like a worthwhile concept.

Hopefully your DS will at least consider something like that. I hope the rest of your day goes better.

Julie

 

 

 

Avatar for mjaye2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 5:16pm

That's so sad. I can't imagine how frustrated you must feel. eeks, only a few more months and it would have been over with. ~~~sigh~~~why oh why can't teens see further ahead than today???

This will be really easy for me to say, but I don't know that I could actually stick with it myself, but here goes...

Tell him you will support him until the end of the school year (or whenever the GED test is scheduled for your area) or some kind of time frame. Tell him, at that point he *must* have a job. If he continues to live at home (if in fact it is?) then he will pay you $XXXX for room and board every month. If he plans on moving out, then he will find out very quickly how expensive it can be. Does he have a car payment, insurance etc? Make sure he is responsible for his expenses. Hopefully, he will realize that it is tough out there in the real world without a hs diploma and will at least get his GED.

I don't know what else to tell you. But here's lots of {{{{{hugs}}}}}}.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 5:35pm

So sorry but he's a big boy now and we are not the only influence in their lives-dont beat yourself up about it

I would look into the process for GED. I think there are age minimums? They really dont want kids dropping out to get GEDs because the schools lose the revenue of attending students

I would locate that info, print it off and leave it for him where you know he will see it

Even if hes not officially depressed, he is likely to be down and testy for awhile. Sorry

It's hard to be supportive of them when you so toally disgree with what they're doing but....with my almost 21 yr old, I have to say that is what has gotten us the furthest(not the HS issues but others)

They learn lessons from life 30 times faster than they learn from us(maybe 300 times)