BCP or condom??

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2004
BCP or condom??
4
Sun, 11-19-2006 - 8:12am

I have been reading a lot of the posts about the BCP and our dd's. I too have been thinking about taking my DD 16 to the Dr. for the BCP. She does have heavy periods, so it may be a plus for that, but, I think she may be thinking about having sex.

I am struggling with this for a couple of reasons..(and when I was younger I really thought I was going to be a much "cooler" mom than I am) I really don't want her to think that I am giving her permission to have sex. AND, secondly, if she knows she is on the pill and can't get pregnant, will that stop her from using a condom? I also want her to be safe from disease!

A little background....DD will be 17 in March, her bf is 19. They have been together about 5 months. This is really her FIRST bf. Other than the I'm going out with so and so, and they go no where kind of bf's, and One short lived romance the summer before last that broke her heart when he "cheated" with on of her best friends.

DD and I have a good relationship. We have talked about this, and I told her if she thinks she is getting to the point, I would take her for BC. She surprised me very much by saying she had thought about "where" it would happen. Although she said she is NOT ready, if she has thought about where, she has definitely been thinking about it!!!! And she said that he has told her he would never pressure her, so they have definitely talked about it! And all while having this conversation, I was really trying to put on a brave front, although I was REALLY freaking out inside!!!

I really am not sure I will make it through tese teenage years...AND, I have another dd 11, to go through it with next!!!! ;-)

I am glad I found this board!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2006
In reply to: ijennn
Sun, 11-19-2006 - 9:58am

BOTH!!! BC pills alone do not prevent std's, HIV, etc. Since the bf is 19, I'd venture to guess he has a sexual history and who know who with, and what sort of people his past partners were. This may be something you'll want to discuss with your dd.

The BC pills will help alleviate the discomfort your dd experiences with her periods, and condoms will help prevent stds, etc.

 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2004
In reply to: ijennn
Sun, 11-19-2006 - 1:27pm

Yes, I agree that she needs both! My fear is that if she knows that shc is on the pill....will it make her be less apt to use a condom, then if it were the other way around???

This is just too scary!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2004
In reply to: ijennn
Sun, 11-19-2006 - 1:30pm

She is 17. That's a young woman now. Take her to your doctor. Have a frank conversation with her (re: BCP ans STD) and encourage her to protect herself.

Sit down with both young people ( at 19, he may be a virgin as well... I know many young man who are and they are in their 20s..) and have a frank conversation with them. Make it clear that if they are engaging in "adult behavior" they have to behave like adults.
In any case, it should out there,in the open.

Good luck

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-05-2006
In reply to: ijennn
Sun, 11-19-2006 - 7:56pm
Putting her on the pill does not mean that you are giving her permission to have sex but shows her that you care about her well being and if she chooses to have sex you don't want to see her pregnant until she is ready. As for the condoms. If she is a smart girl, and she seems to be, and she respects your advice she will surely use them for safety reasons.