AFTERMATH OF A RAMPAGE

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2006
AFTERMATH OF A RAMPAGE
13
Wed, 04-18-2007 - 9:55pm

Monday, right before lunch: Breaking News Alert on the TV. Similar to a moment I endured on September 11th not so many years ago, I literally froze and held my breath. What is happening in our society? Already, those with selfish agendas are lining up for the finger pointing parades. Who do we blame?

Gun control
VA Tech University Security
Police Emergency Response
Mental Health Professionals
Media & Popular Culture
Immigration Burdens
The Gunman’s Family, Friends, Roommates

My opinion, society is our major contributor to these tragedies. Commonplace in our reality today are many expressions of violence; rage, desperation, insanity, desire for personal gain, discrimination or more simply, ignorance. Prejudice for those who are different, contempt for unexplainable reasons and a blind eye to those who are suffering are pervasive in our mainstream culture.

Violence permeates our minds and hearts. Following the incident at VA Tech, our moral outrage peaks until time and other facets of life distract our thoughts. The effects of violence are constructive only in that the consequences determine our agenda, retroactively.

Violence is impractical because it is a descending spiral ending in destruction for all. It is immoral because it seeks to humiliate the opponent rather than win his understanding: it seeks to annihilate rather than convert. Violence is immoral because it thrives on hatred rather than love. It destroys community and makes brotherhood impossible. It leaves society in monologue rather than dialogue. Violence ends up defeating itself. It creates bitterness in the survivors and brutality in the destroyers.
Martin Luther King, 1964

Expressions of sympathy pour out to the survivors of violent attacks, while words of gratitude are silently murmured that it was not our loved one. As the parent of one graduate student and one college bound teen, it was by the grace of God it was not UNC-Chapel Hill. We all pray ”someone” will address these atrocities. Who will be that “someone?” Our collective lack of humanity is creating an environment where these incidents occur faster than we can lock away, rehabilitate or execute the violent offenders.

Do I believe that our society prompted Cho Seung-Hui to inflict this devastation? Probably not. Cho Seung-Hui alone committed these horrific crimes. There will be much speculation on what prompted this attack; mental illness, evil, environment, personal choice, abuse, genetics or character flaws. Let us all take pause and make a positive impact on our individual communities, accepting responsibility for our actions, embrace our differences, discover our compassion, humanity and respect for others may assist us in becoming that “someone.” Just my two cents.

At the end of the day, Where is The Love? (The words to this song by the rap group Blacked Eyed Peas)

Hug your children today.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2006
Thu, 04-19-2007 - 9:34am

Well-written, whatsupmom.

DS17 was quite disturbed by this. He rarely gets on the inet, except for schoolwork or music, but had to view the NBC video last night. I think he's really afraid that he might end up with some disturbed roommate in fall.

It's another red flag that we must teach our kids the importance of tolerance, respect for one another's differences and the value of living in a community in which we help not only our friends and families, but reach out to those unknowns who are troubled. I told DS that if we do all that, we can decrease the likelihood of horrific episodes, but that there'll always be whackos who are unreachable. The chance that we'll end up as one of their victims is miniscule, and we don't need to worry about this in our everyday lives. But quietly, in our minds, we need to always remember that when innocent lives are taken, whether in Iraq or in Blacksburg, it strengthens the case for the existence of an afterlife if one believes God (Christ, Allah, Vishnu, Buddha....)is good. No matter what our religious beliefs, that hope and faith is the deepseated source of our strength.

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http://www.pnhp.org/news/2009/october/meet_the_new_health_.php

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQTBYQlQ7yM

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2005
Thu, 04-19-2007 - 2:23pm

The problem I have with all this is that the one and only person to blame in all of this is the perpetrator.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2006
Thu, 04-19-2007 - 2:33pm

I absolutely agree with you and said as much in my post, Cho Seung-Hui is repsonsible for these horrific crimes and his behavior. Additionally, I agree that the videos bombarding our homes are paying homage to his deluded thoughts and actions.

When tragedies such as these occur my thoughts turn towards, where are we headed as a society? This type of violence seems more prevalent every year. It saddens me and makes me look to individual behavior, responsibility and treatment of others.

As the devastation of yet another violent rampage impacts our world...I merely ponder where we are headed as a community.

Anna

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-19-2007 - 2:48pm

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I agree. I am seriously worried about copycats and my own kids. My college son will be home May 3rd and my mind has actually gone "OK, that's not enough time to put something together"

But my high schooler will go into June because of snow days and yeah....all this coverage, the Columbine anniversary. It's worrisome.

Mostly, though, I think the images are disrespectful to the families and unnecessary in order to tell the story. They could have read his words on the news-if there is any insight to be found (???) it's going to be in his words, not in these photographs.

I can't fathom being one of these parents -period. But having to see that beast in the way your child saw him in their last seconds of life....on every news stand, TV blip, internet news site.......

Theres nothing to be gained except ratings

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2005
Thu, 04-19-2007 - 2:53pm


Agreed, we all tend to want to blame someone who is still around to take the blame (as a coward, he is not). But I'm concerned that we take the focus off who is really to blame when we start to wonder "well, maybe if we had treated him differently."

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2006
Fri, 04-20-2007 - 12:17am
Well, on the surface, of course Cho is to blame. But he did not grow up in a bubble. I don't like the media coverage, either, and there's a good possibility the media has negatively affected this guy over the years. We are a part of the society in which he grew to be the crazy guy he was, and we do have some responsibility. We do need to take a look at our laws and our views of mental illness to see if we can change them to prevent the monsterization of sick people.

-----------------------------------------------
http://www.pnhp.org/news/2009/october/meet_the_new_health_.php

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQTBYQlQ7yM

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2005
Fri, 04-20-2007 - 12:33am

Not just the surface, imho.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2000
Fri, 04-20-2007 - 10:06am
I agree with you, Marie.
Pam
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007
Sat, 04-21-2007 - 9:06am
The one aspect of this story that I keep thinking about is his family. Can any of us imagine--as parents of teens--how mortifyingly horrific it would be to be this kid's parents? I have to think they are blaming themselves for not realizing how sick he was. I can't imagine what they are going through, not only losing their son, but knowing that he was responsible for all of this.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2004
Sat, 04-21-2007 - 11:13am

Actually, from what I read, they tried to get him help.

I am not going to comment on this young man because I have a different take on him. Just as I did not "demonize" the Dawson College & the Ecole Politechnique killers here, I don't believe that the same should happen with this very mentally disturbed young man. The severely mentally disturbed do not chose to be sick.

I hope that all 33 will find peace and that some good will come out of this tragedy. But I doubt it. Tighter gun controls (being a Canadian I have a hard time understanding your lax gun laws), more emphasis on mental health and money spent on treatment and preventative measures....

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