Should I be encouraging this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2006
Should I be encouraging this?
6
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 1:16pm

I'm a step mother to a very active 14 year old boy. This year his friends and him have been practicing their version of 'parkour' or 'freewalking'. (there are about a hundred videos on You Tube if you'd like to take a look) Basically it's running and jumping over and on anything you can in the city.

I've been promoting this activity since it keeps him busy and fit and I know he likes a challenge. I don't want him to become bored as kids in the city who are bored will find...other stimulation that I don't want him into. His friends and him (for the most part) aren't into drugs or even girls very much yet. He's honest, doesn't steal, doesn't give us much lip and is a good kid. He's even improved his grades considerably this year and we are proud of him.

So I've signed him up for a real parkour course that is offered in our city for kids his age. I'm hoping that he'll learn some skills so I can worry less about him breaking a leg (or worse).

Here's my dilema: He confides in me about stuff he does and we get along quite well. He told me recently that he is able to climb up balconies and how 'it's hard when no one wants you on their property'. Um...WHAT? I assumed he was staying in parks and public areas. Now I find out he goes on roofs and apartment buildings and I'm worried that I've inadvertently given him the go ahead to be just another reckless, law-breaking teen! I don't want to take this activity away from him. I also don't want to 'be a spaz' and risk him not telling me any of his activities anymore. I enjoy the fact that he tells me the truth. Even if the truth isn't what I want to hear. (The older he gets the more I will charish the fact that this kid is honest with me!) I will tell him the risks involved in trespassing, how it will upset us if police came to our house, etc. But I'm not sure how to handle this in a parent way!

What would you do?

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Avatar for jbgattuso
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2003
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 1:40pm

I am guessing that if there is a class for such an activity, they would stress that you shouldn't take this to the "ileagal" side of things. I think that I would find out more about the class, and if it is the case that they want you to climb things only when it is legal, I would let him do it....but yes, continue to stress that you do not want him taking it to the side of violating the law. Hard call on this one, cause I would guess that like anything else there are people taking this too far. I must tell you I personally wouldn't want my son climbing balconeys or on roofs even if it were legal. I think I would sign him up for rock climbing or something LOL Good luck,

Julie

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2006
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 4:36pm

I am hoping that they take the time to discuss with the kids where is an appropriate place to practice and where isn't. I pointed out to my Step son that the instructors of his class are adults and therefore can't risk jail or a hefty fine for doing what they do. I suggested that he ask them where are some good places around our city. I'm sure there are plenty!

They do the training in a gym with mats and ballance beams. Then they take the kids outside to a local beach/park to practice. I have looked into it and it seems pretty cool. A combination of gymnastics and martial arts.

This is why I don't want to take the class from him. It seems so neat. And I've watched the instructors in action and they seem to focus on safety and body movement. Pushing oneself to the next level but knowing what the body is capable of.

I just hope that my kid isn't the kid that takes this too far. I have this horrible image of him being taken home by the cops and the cops saying, "Yah..he said you were ok with him climbing up the side of the bank...but the bank wasn't too impressed."

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Avatar for suzyk2118
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-1997
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 4:48pm

Maybe you could drop the hint to the instructor to bring this up in class...to keep it legal, etc.

Sue

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-1999
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 5:35pm

There are legal and illegal sides to so many of the things teen boys get into - especially if they're natural born risk takers.

Avatar for coldfingers
Community Leader
Registered: 04-30-2000
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 9:19am

I would let him take the course.

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Avatar for weberdns0
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2000
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 9:24am
I would tell him that if he continues this type of illegal behavior that you will withdraw him from the class.