Hey Daddioe, remember when you said...

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Registered: 07-22-2003
Hey Daddioe, remember when you said...
2
Sat, 12-22-2007 - 1:14am

to me in chat about keep my ears open of Kels saying "You don't understand him" or "He's misunderstood" or something like that. I asked about it and you said that if she is saying that she isn't looking at what's going on, but ........... and I can't remember what it was you said or how you put it.


I was trying to tell Dave, because it made so much sense and my old brain isn't remembering. Hopefully yours isn't as bad as mine and you will remember the conversation and what it was that you said.


TIA!

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Registered: 11-13-2004
Sat, 12-22-2007 - 10:30am

I do remember that Kristie. Your DD is dating a boy that has gotten into some trouble in the past. The healthy thing for him to do is to own his past behavior. If your DD makes comments like “no one understands him”, he’s just “misunderstood”, etc. it can be a red flag that he’s manipulated her into buying into his victim role. At that point, she’s seeing things not as they are, but how she wants them to be. It’s hard for BF to make positive changes in his life if he's convinced everyone around him that all his past troubles are a product of circumstance.


Avatar for bookwormmom
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Registered: 07-22-2003
Sat, 12-22-2007 - 4:55pm

Thanks for the reply, that makes a lot of sense. I will be talking to Dave and to Kelsie about this whole concept. So far she hasn't been saying things to that effect, but I am keeping ears and eyes open for sure.


I hope others are reading this thread, I think this is very sound advice and I think there are a few people here that can benefit from this one, for sure.

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