I am SOO in over my head here.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-29-2003
I am SOO in over my head here.
27
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 4:19pm

Ok--I need some serious advice here.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2006
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 4:58pm

(((Hugs))) to you,

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2007
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 5:31pm

OH MY....I would definitly be going over to her house to have a sit down with her parents that includes the fact that all this behavoir will need to STOP right away...or yes, you will have to file those charges.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2006
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 5:43pm

I think I'd first try talking directly to the girl. If she refuses or is too irrational, let her know that you'll have to contact her parents. There's no need to get her parents all upset if you can get her to return your DS's phone and can make her understand that the threats she's making can get her into serious trouble, and that she should not be hitting and needs to learn to control her anger.

What are their ages? If they're 18, I'd definitely talk to the girl first. If they're 15, I'd be more likely to approach the parents.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2005
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 6:30pm

I would make it abundantly clear that should she HIT your son again, you will not contact the school or her parents, but the police. She is being abusive.


You

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 6:41pm

I wouldn't feel comfortable talking to her at this point-she has already proved she is irrational in this area

Because of the college thing, I would feel obligated to give the parents a warning that if ANYTHING happened in this arena from this moment forward, a restraining order would be sought.

What does DS think? Would he admit to being struck? If he denies it, you may have some difficulty moving forward legally since you did not witness it.

I'd STILL tell the parents but wanted to bring that up

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-29-2003
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 6:45pm

update.

Avatar for mjaye2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 6:46pm

I'm probably going to get seriously slammed for this, but...


Although I do NOT condone what EITHER teen has said or done, I would not involve the police.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2006
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 7:07pm
I don't agree with you on the double-standard, but I do think it's more fine-grained than "she hit him". Given their history and their ages, I think all six people sitting down (parents and kids) and saying "none of this behavior is tolerable" and both kids should avoid each other as much as possible. I think also letting this girl know that her behavior could be construed as criminal - hitting, taking his phone, threatening - and while the OP is not going to pursue it with the police, someone else might not be so generous

Sue, mom to Leah and Seth


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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2007
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 7:17pm

(((((((((((((((((((SHELS))))))))))))))))) you hang in there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2007
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 7:38pm

All I can say is that my son was "bullied" right out of his school by a girl who was mad because she couldn't have what she wanted any more... who didn't even go there anymore :(

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