Miserable
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Miserable
| Sat, 07-10-2004 - 12:59am |
Hello all! I am a 29 year old woman who was in a 5 year relationship with a man (E. Neil B.) We were together for 3 and still seeing each other for 2 after we decided that a relationship wasn't going to work. It was ok for the 1st 2 years then the insecurity, jealousy came out. I must admit that the relationship got real tired but we still enjoyed each other's company. So we saw eachother on weekends and eventually that died down. Then it got to the point that we only end up meeting for sex. I am so miserable right now. I know I need to be rid of him but I can't help missing him and feeling so lonely especially during the weekends. We made an agreement to tell eachother if we have other people in our lives, but he hasn't told me anything yet. I am not seeing anyone right now but I am not so sure about him. I can't help but think that he is with another woman and it is killing me. Why won't he just tell me if he is? He just sort-of cut me off, no explaination, no communication at all and I wasn't given a chance to say a word!!! I hate loose ends and can't seem to get past it. The last time we were together was July 5, 2004.
We have a history of verbal abuse to eachother. It is something that I learned from him mostly. When things got ugly, they really got ugly and lots of things were said; but in the end we both ended up back in the sack. I have been depressed about this situation for 2 years and it seems it is only getting worse. Crying myself to sleep some nights and feeling like a zombie during the day. I don't know what to do! I don't have any friends to talk to and I don't have money to see a professional. A few times I have attempted suicide by way of sleeping pills.
I still love this man (i don't know why) but he clearly does not want to be with me anymore and I can't get him out of my head. Someone please help.
Signatures On
| Sat, 07-10-2004 - 1:23pm |
sweetie, i know its hard right now but you have to really stop seeing the man, its harsh i know but eventually it will do you good. my ex dumped me after saying he needed space and he was very distant after a week i found out that he is seeing someone new, i thought i was going to die, but believe me i didnt, i survived each day..do you think he loves you when hes treating you like that? honey its so hard to breakup with someone that you love but its also hard to know that someone doesnt care for your feelings...it will get better once you start the no contact thing..tust me, listen to advices from these people who post, but then again in the end its still your choice...but trust me it will get better. its a looong process but just pray to god and he will give you the strength that you never knew you had. hang in there....look for my other post "a little something for strength" ...
