Rebound article and such

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Registered: 03-20-2004
Rebound article and such
Tue, 07-13-2004 - 11:38pm
A friend sent me an article from the Orlando Sentinel about rebounding after relationships. I found it very enlightening. Here are a bunch of the statements I found helpful.

"Women need to talk and talk and talk and men are already at the bars picking up new girls while the girls are still talking"

"Girls today are more likely to do a hookup or a one night stand, but are also more likely than men to be looking for something," she says. That something is affection and caring."

"Women may say they can handle the matter-of-fact sexuality of a hookup, Schwab notes, but "in fact be disappointed that they didn't cuddle all night"

"Gordon Hatcher, a marriage and family therapist in Orlando, says people on the rebound want reassurance that they're still attractive. "

"It's pride. Guys are so confident and cocky it's ridiculous," he says. When his pride was hurt he says, he "went out and found a hotter girl" for a hookup."

"Relationship experts have for eons recommended that people take time to recover after a breakup, rather than jumping into another relationship--or another bed."

"Men and women can easily fall into bad dating patterns. Te men who jump from woman to woman in ther 20s are the same ones who in their 30s and 40s wonder why their marriages aren't fulfilling, Newcomer says."

"Women who don't take time to learn from breakups often repeatedly fall into relationships with the same type of man."

"They (women) are just happy to have someone in the next room," Newcomer says. "They feel lost without another person in their life."

"Some rebounders find the thought of alone time frightening, but alone doesn't have to equal lonely."

"Valentine says volunteer work and hobbies can help fill the couple time. Besides, the most important goal after a breakup is learning what went wrong."

"Healing is embracing the emotional experience around the loss and giving reflection to the relationship," says Martha Lisa, a licensed Witner Park Therapist. "and that can't be done when your focus is on another person."

This guy they interviewed had a one night stand a few weeks after the breakup but has now been broken up for 8 months and hasn't gotten into a relationship and they quoted him saying "Sex gives you a sense of pride but time is the cure-all."