please help, first time ever
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please help, first time ever
| Tue, 07-20-2004 - 2:41am |
I am 23 years old and this was my 2nd real relationship. It lasted 11 months, we met in the Us where I go to college. I am originally from Croatia, Europe and he is from France. We started dating last august and in January he graduated and went back to France for work and we have had a long distance relationshp ever since. I just came back from visiting him in Paris yesterday where he told me, right before i was boarding the train, that he can't go on like this anymore. He cried, said he loved me but still, he broke up with me. The thing is, I really do love this guy. With all his flaws and all his quirks, I still love every little bit of him. I even thought of how it would be to marry him, something I am usually very opposed to when it comes to young people my age.
So, how do I do this? I have a feeling that he was the one and I can't bear the thought that we are breaking up not because we don't love eachother but because we are far away. I mean, i still talk to him often and see him once a month and spend so much money on it as it is, what else can i do? I just don't know what to do with myself right now..I don't feel like going anywhere, talking to anybody and have a constant sad look on my face.
I will talk to him tonite though so if anybody's reading this pray that we come to some kind of mutual agreement on how to keep this relationship going. And if there is anybody else outhere that had a long distance relationship and has some words of comfort I would be very very grateful if you could share them with me.
Thanxs to everybody for listening...
So, how do I do this? I have a feeling that he was the one and I can't bear the thought that we are breaking up not because we don't love eachother but because we are far away. I mean, i still talk to him often and see him once a month and spend so much money on it as it is, what else can i do? I just don't know what to do with myself right now..I don't feel like going anywhere, talking to anybody and have a constant sad look on my face.
I will talk to him tonite though so if anybody's reading this pray that we come to some kind of mutual agreement on how to keep this relationship going. And if there is anybody else outhere that had a long distance relationship and has some words of comfort I would be very very grateful if you could share them with me.
Thanxs to everybody for listening...

Unless you plan on moving to France in the very near future, your best option would be to let him go. I know you think he is "the One," but please believe me when I tell you that there is no such thing as "the One" - meaning that there is no such thing as one, and only one, guy in the entire world destined by the Fates to be your soul mate and husband. Desperately trying to hang on to him when he's made his feelings clear to you will only cause you more pain, and in the end nothing will have changed except your emotional health.
As for not know what to do with yourself, not wanting to go anywhere, etc.: Honey, that's normal. It's perfectly reasonable to feel depressed and sad after a breakup. It does NOT, however, mean that you made a mistake. You will, slowly, move on with your life and yes, you will find love again. Good Luck.
i just wanted to say thank you for replying...this is my first time experiencing love and my first time on an online thread as well so it was nice seeing somebody read, thought about and replied to my little cry for help
im directing this question to you too even though i started a new little thread, because you gave me the idea..
you said that 'the one' doesnt exist..maybe it is true even though i am one of those that would like to believe that there is a soulmate just for me. ok, so this is the question..i noticed that there isn't a whole lot of quality men out there so finding even one of 'the ones' is difficult..so when you finally do meet this smart, funny, cute, all around 'perfect' guy, how do you let go knowing that it might take you forever to find somebody that comes close to that (and isn't already taken)..sometimes i think that that is close to a miracle