I made a mistake and saw him again
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| Fri, 10-01-2004 - 8:44am |
We had a very close relationship as friends and to me it was devastating to realise that he could give up so easily on us. I decided not to contact him again even, so for a month a half I was doing fine. However we had planned a boat holiday with his friends many months before the breakup and he convinced me that I should go, so we saw each other last week. Deep inside I wanted to talk and maybe get back together.
The holiday was a disaster, it was a terrible mistake to see him again. We slept in the same room for a week and nothing happened. We didn't even talk about our relationship, we never talked about anything personal. I was so upset because my feelings for him are still very intense and he was just indifferent to me.
I saw him so happy, so relaxed and excited about his new life. I felt devastated again because I am having a hard time while he is really happy. I never saw him like that before, he was depressing and I helped him throught this.
I am very upset for putting myself in such vulnerable position again. No contact was doing great to my mental stability and I trashed it. Now I feel like anger is filling my body and mind, I don't know what to do. I need to find a way to release all this anger, otherwise I will hurt myself.
My story should be taken as an example of what not to do. Do not try to contact your ex, things are not going to change. You cannot change people's mind and feelings.
Iliana

I actually really needed to see your email because I heard from my ex earlier this week and then contacted him and got an email from him this morning. It has been almost three weeks since we broke up (I initiated the breakup, but he seemed to accept it ok) and I'm still not over him, nowhere near it ...
I know how easy it is to go back, so I have to be really cautious. I also know how easy it is to delude yourself into thinking that you mean more to him than you actually do because he contacted you to say hi. So anyway, thanks very much for your words of wisdom. I really appreciate them. And remember, stay away from that man!
Please try and stay strong, you deserve the best so don't settle for less,you have a lot to give so find someone who'll appreciate it, in the mean time spoil yourself.