i am going crazy i need someones advice
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| Fri, 10-15-2004 - 1:21am |
3 am i feel someone touching my shoulder waking me up he wanted to talk at 3 am he said he couldnt sleep he was thinking and he didnt think breaking up was the best thing to do we should give it another try..i never agreed i guess i just went with the flow...everything was peachy for 3 weeks all of the sudden one night i was at work he stopped by my job this was after having been upset and not talking to each other for 3 days he shows up to tell me some coins his grandad gave him b4 dying were missing he put it this way "somebody took my coins" there is only 4 ppl in this house him me and my 2 children so he was accusing me and my 2 children mind you i never knew these coins existed he told me if his coins didnt come up we had to get out the house in the morning so he told me when u get hom etonight look for them if uy cant find them is a wrap u have to go u all have to go...that broke my heart.
the coins were found but i wanted absolutely nutin to do with him how dare hw shows up at my job and accuses me or my children of taking his coins well he says he never accused noone and he called to apologize for his behavior...i lethim have it i told him this is not working is not it will never work is back to roomates again u do u and i will do me and my children...he got upset and didnt show up the next morning...to this day i dont know where he spent the day...we talked later that night he told me he thought a lot about the situation and we should take a break from each other...but this is his idea of a break like i mentined b4 since i have nowhere to go i have to stay here so again i told him how things would be u do ur own laundry cook ur own food buy ur soap buy ur food...well he doesnt think that should change because we live under the same roof so everything should stay the same except that we wont have a title we r not boyfriend and girlfreind we r not friends we r not lovers we r simply us 2 people living under the same roof helping each other grow and he says in the future we can assume titles again but 4 now lets be happy and enjoy each other and keep doing what we were doing....what the hell is going on em i going crazy what does all this mean im so confused heartbroken i dont kno i have a full pot of emotions i can describe..HELP PLEASE!!

It sounds like he doesn't want the restriction of being in a relationship with you, but he still wants the perks of being in a relationship with you. I think from his perspective, this would allow him the leeway of seeing other women, AND still sleep with you AND still have the perk of you handling the groceries, cooking, cleaning, his laundry, blah, blah, blah. Why else would he become saddened upon hearing that he had to take care of his own domestic responsibilities? He backpeddled so quickly in an effort to reel you back in to still allowing him the perks of being his girlfriend, without truly being his girl.
I say stick to your guns. Until you're able to get your own place, let him shop for and pick up his own groceries and other items, cook his own food, do his own laundry, etc.
He isn't giving you what you want so don't let him weasel his way back into your good graces and acting like you're his girlfriend, when he clearly wants to be free to see other women.
I'm sorry you're feeling heartbroken. Consider it a blessing that he showed his true colors. We're all here to support you whatever you decide.
All the best,
Heymum