is he sending mixed signals?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2004
is he sending mixed signals?
Tue, 10-26-2004 - 11:08pm
hey guys!!! i been posting my situation for a while now my ex and i broke up but had to stay in the same house for financial reasons..it was killing me to be there and not be with him i ask my self y do i love this 21 year old man y did i get all cut up in feelings with him when the relationship didnt start in a good note but i kept trying because i wanted to make him what i wanted well thats past is over now it really got ugly saturday i had posted earlier that i found some gay porn on my pc that he was looking at well saturday i couldnt stand it anymore and i confronted him on some issues that were making my chest ready to explode but the reason y i did it was because we were watching a movie and his phone rang he didnt answer typical of course it was another female well i asked him y he didnt answer he said because he was watching the movie and didnt feel like talking but i knew it was a female when the movie ended he ran in the bathroom and talked to a female when he got out the bathroom i confronted him and asked him if he was sleeping with someone else he got scared and said no i am not y and i didnt say i said but you are talking and seeing someone else he said he has female friends but he is not seeing noone else and he told me we are not together we shouldnt even be having this conversation i told him of course is fine and dandy that we are not together for your convenience but is nice when youi want something to eat i fix it for you and i do your laundry thats fine but the only reason you wanted this lets be friends and be happy get along shyt is because you had an alterior motive you wanna do what u wanna do and im not going for it it stops here...then i confronted him on the gay websites and he gave me some lame excuse that is a way of making money because no woman will pay a fat black man for comapny but old gay men would and he was introduced byt a gay friend he has...he said he was sorry he didnt tell me but he was afraid of my reaction....then i topped it all off with telling him that im going back home to new york he asked me when dd i make that decison he even asked me what time i decided this well he got really sick to his stomach and threw up he couldnt sleep that night or hasnt been able to sleep since saturday i think he is hurting but he says he isnt but he has found options for me to stay he asked me if he came up with some money if i would stay and find a place here then he told me yesterday that the money that i will be using to move back home i could use to find an apt here does he want me to stay what is going on is like he is sending me mixed signals then today we talked for like 3 hrs and i told him a lot of things that bothered me thru the whole relationship and i know he felt bad but i had to say how i felt i also told him i want no contact or communication once i leave and he was upset and asked me if i wouldnt communicate with is mom either why is it so importnat to him to keep in contact with me does he want me to stay here and since i made up my mind why does he need me to keep in contact why?????????? im very hurt very confused i been thru so much with him and he only used me and i told him i felt used thru the whole relationship..and when he tells me he wishes me luck it doesnt sound sincere....help please