I Moved Out!!
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I Moved Out!!
| Sat, 02-26-2005 - 12:16am |
Hey everyone!
I had started this discussion last week in the living together board--bc i had been living with my bf (now my ex). I wanted to put in here, bc im hoping you all can give me some feedback and advice!!
Thanks & Hugs!!
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rllivingtoge&msg=10205.1&ctx=0

Thanks for reposting. Your reasons for leaving have caused me to once again reexamine why my Ex had decided to bail.
We had financial challenges too. The job I had wasn't the greatest paying job in the world - far from it - but the health insurance was excellent and that kept me around probably longer than I should have stayed. Arguments about money always seemed to escalate into nastiness. At my Ex's urging, I tried to find a better paying job but then the bottom dropped out and I was laid off. Then came 9/11. Yes, those were gloomy days.
I was down for sure but not out. When I tried to get some encouragement from her, she would only criticize and make me feel bad about myself. I guess some of the criticism was deserved. But I hated the fact that she was kicking me when I was down.
Well, she finally found the sugar daddy who could make all of her financial worries disappear. She hastily moved out of town and in with this guy.
The cruel irony is that after the break, my life turned around dramatically - for the better! Here I was now, reestablished, feeling good and able to pay the freight. But, it was too late. I look at us now and think of what might have been. If only she had stuck it out a bit longer.
So I understand where you're coming from and I can appreciate your position. It helps me to better understand her position, too. The bottom line was that I couldn't afford to give her all that she needed in the material sense. She always had my love and devotion. She always will.
In your case, your ex was stuck in that rut of feeling worthless and developed some bad financial habits. I suppose I'd feel resentful, too, if someone wasn't lifting a finger to help or was gambling compulsively. Definitely not good.
If and when he gets it together, maybe you two can hook up again. That's a fantasy of mine - reconciling with the Ex. I know that the next time around would be a lot different but all I can do is dream about it. Sugar Daddy and her are talking marriage so chances of that fantasy becoming a reality appear to be slim to none.
Yes, the regrets of the past have a way of lingering in the back of your mind. What if? What if...