What would possese an Ex to~

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2002
What would possese an Ex to~
3
Sun, 11-13-2005 - 9:37am

call 14 times over a period of 2 days and then finally leave a message after the 10th time just to ask for your address,so he can send me something, when they know where you live..Wouldn't you just go past the house? This is the first time he has called since the divorce 2 1/2 months ago..I heard he was seeing someone, if thats the case, why bother me. He must not be that happy, because if I was seeing someone else I sure as heck wouldn't be calling my ex 14 times or emailing him... I told him in an email that I didn't want any part of him, in my heart, thoughts and my life...2 weeks later he calls with this lame excuse. Does he not want to see me heal and move one.

Whats that all about?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2004
Sun, 11-13-2005 - 11:25am
14 times?????????? That seems like an awful lot to just ask for an address! Maybe he got embarrassed after you never answered the phone and so he quickly came up with an excuse for all of his calling. Well..... does he want you to move on? I think they always want to be wanted by their exes... So but does that change anything for you, it shouldn't! You were SO STRONG to not answer the phone! WOW, i would have caved for sure!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2002
Sun, 11-13-2005 - 3:47pm
Well, I'm not as strong as I should be. I did cave and left a message on his land line because I knew he would not be home told him that i couldn't believe he didn't have my address, then I called the next day on his cell and told him that if he still needed it to call me back...haven't heard nothing...he knows that if he messes with my head like that I have a hard time healing and movin forward..I think he is trying to prevent that...I can't think of why else he would do that...
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2004
Sun, 11-13-2005 - 11:01pm
I am going through a break up right now as well. And I was speaking to someone about my ex not giving me space and vice versa - I have completed or even really started the No Contact for 60 days - he lives across the hall and it makes it almost impossible. Anyhow, this friend said "He does not want you, but he does not want anyone else to have you either." That was basically the gist of it. They want us to have them in our head for as long as possible so we can not move on. It may be suconsious on their part, however, possibly not.